posted
Girlyfootlvr, Sorry to hear that. Like I have told my wife on many ocassions, " I did not get married to NOT have sex! I was doing that perfectly fine on my own". Which begs the question: "why did you marry her?" and "would she kill you to find you're on this site?' You need to do some serious soul searching. Who do you want? The woman you married or the woman you want her to be? Answer that and you'll have your answer about a new wife. lamp, Yes, talking should help both of you out. However, if this foot fetish is as much a part of you as it is me, I would end it. You're not happy, so you get frustrated with her. She knows this, and feels this. She will eventually get frustrated with you being frustrated with her, etc. See where this is going? End it before things go wrong.
Posts: 48 | Registered: Mar 2008
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posted
well guys thanks for all the lovely sympathy.
my situation is a very strange one because i have a sex life that is so on and off!
ive spent a lot of work and time building the foot thing between us and she has come to accept it and do a damn good job of pleasuring me when the mood is right.
she is a very volatile woman, i mean extremely diffenent mood swings from week to week.
she can be an absolute bitch and equally and super affectionate woman but i know deep down she loves me.
my problem is making all the effort to initiate a regular sex life. sometimes she is more that happy to please me.
i have been through so much desperation in my time with her that it becomes clear when im horny and i almost feel like im pestering.
nevertheless she has promised me some quality time with her feet tonight and if i dont get any im gonna be one unhappy dude!
it could be the deciding factor or provoke a very deep discussion with her.
it is very difficult for me as i do love her as a person and we do still have a lot of fun. i dont know if its adjusting to living together...
somedays the relationship is great. when the sex is inconsistent then im grumpy
could it partly be my fault? should i be more positive to approaching sex.
i must be doing something right when i do manage to score. the first week we moved in were at it like rabbits for nearly a week...
Posts: 483 | Registered: Jan 2007
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posted
ive made it clear how big a part of my foot fetish is of me. she will have to take it or leave it and i need the right to excercise my fetish at leas once a week. its so fucked up how somedays weeks she relaxed about sex and others she'll rather go to bed at 9pm. i know the girl has issues and i love her but i have a right to be sexually happy
tonight could be the deciding factor.
i'll keep you updated
Posts: 483 | Registered: Jan 2007
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posted
I would think a real converstion is in order one in which you share and also listen carefully. Have you really been clear about your wishes explaining things in a calm way or have you just blurted out your frustratuions to her. Have you taken the time to ask her how she actually feels about it and why she may be negative regarding this. At the end of all the heart to heart conversation, if she remains unwilling to be more open, then you have some serious decision making to do. While sex in a relationship may not be the largest part it is a very important one nonetheless. So if you take the relationship further when you are completely frustrated as is don't think that it will get any better. Can you live with that? I know it's feet but what would be the difference if you liked kissing very much and she did not or if you liked giving her oral but she did not. Compatibility can be worked on but both parties have to be willing. If she is not willing and you decide to stay them prepare to be miserable. Period!!
-------------------- New Ship but she's got the right name. You treat her like a lady and she'll always bring you home. Posts: 4051 | Registered: Apr 2005
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posted
well she did give me a footjob lastnight and it as very very nice!
however she made me feel bad about it. not only did she get really angry at me for spilling all over the sheets (which i tried to laugh about and cleaned up) but she gives me that nasty look and tells me she wont paint her nails untill the summer. she makes me wait and wait and i end up pestering her and having to organise my time around hoping for it to happen! its not spontanious, its organised and i feel bad for it.
i think a large part of it may be her not understanding my needs and not seeing sex as important as it is. she says to me im making a big deal out of nothing and she doesnt need sex. however that leads to my frustration and me not dealing with it in the proper way. yes, i have almost given up on being polite about it and my hints are not subtle. for the first time this morning she tells me im going about it in the wrong way! but it wont happen unless i force it! i cant be doing with the guilt trip.
i tried to talk to her about it this morning but she got angry, telling me she didnt want to talk and that this is all in my head. but its not in my head. i have told her that im not gonna change and she will have to accept that, but she tells me she absolutely fine with me fetish.
she will just give answers to win an arguement but totaly contradicts herself. im just generally pissed off with her and having a moan becasue i really need to. im going back to my parents house for a few days and leaving her alone.
and im really sorry to use this forum as a place to vent. as you know i come here on and off and right now you guys are very helpfull and there are some awesome pics of feet to cheer me up!
Posts: 483 | Registered: Jan 2007
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quote:Originally posted by lamp: well she did give me a footjob lastnight and it as very very nice!
however she made me feel bad about it. not only did she get really angry at me for spilling all over the sheets (which i tried to laugh about and cleaned up) but she gives me that nasty look and tells me she wont paint her nails untill the summer. she makes me wait and wait and i end up pestering her and having to organise my time around hoping for it to happen! its not spontanious, its organised and i feel bad for it.
i think a large part of it may be her not understanding my needs and not seeing sex as important as it is. she says to me im making a big deal out of nothing and she doesnt need sex. however that leads to my frustration and me not dealing with it in the proper way. yes, i have almost given up on being polite about it and my hints are not subtle. for the first time this morning she tells me im going about it in the wrong way! but it wont happen unless i force it! i cant be doing with the guilt trip.
i tried to talk to her about it this morning but she got angry, telling me she didnt want to talk and that this is all in my head. but its not in my head. i have told her that im not gonna change and she will have to accept that, but she tells me she absolutely fine with me fetish.
she will just give answers to win an arguement but totaly contradicts herself. im just generally pissed off with her and having a moan becasue i really need to. im going back to my parents house for a few days and leaving her alone.
and im really sorry to use this forum as a place to vent. as you know i come here on and off and right now you guys are very helpfull and there are some awesome pics of feet to cheer me up!
Fuck man run now.
-------------------- My wife's sweet ass and feet Posts: 2151 | Registered: Nov 2004
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quote:So.......what am I supposed to do? Get another wife???!!! Easier said, than done!!
girlyfootluver I have one thing to say to you:
BOOOOOO HOOOOO !!!
Yes get another wife, fuck as they say life is too short !! Why be in a misreable relationship. You dont sound happy to me either. Man my wife showed no mercy on me, she took the kids to another country and fucked off !! Its hard and as Toetapper said it stings but its for the best and for a more compatible partner next time round.
Heres to you and Lamp finding a better partner Posts: 461 | Registered: Dec 2002
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quote:Originally posted by babeflover: Fuck man run now. [/QB]
I'm with you! Get the Hell out Lamp. It seems as though she in bipolar and needs to get help. If you are in love with he, make sure she gets help. However, I wouldn't stay with her.
I have been married for nearly 20 years. We fight, we bitch, and we yell. But, we work things out because we talk and we (hate to sound cliche) "give-and-take". When she's not in the mood or just tired, I use her feet. (i.e. I massage her feet until she's "jell-o", then I use her feet. She's so relaxed, she doesn't care if I soil the sheets. Your girl should be happy that she is the recipient of this attention. You could be going somewhere else.
Posts: 48 | Registered: Mar 2008
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posted
quoting elric1266. ......When she's not in the mood or just tired, I use her feet......
Exactly right. my wife doesn't have to have sex with me if she isn't in the mood. but i don't have to go around dissatisfy either, her feet on my face, and problem solve.
-------------------- My wife's sweet ass and feet Posts: 2151 | Registered: Nov 2004
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posted
Usually living with one another is the litmus test to whether or not people are truly compatible with another. If you want my opinion, it seems to me that you and your girl aren't. You know what I mean?, it's like she's finally shown her true colors after 3 years now that you've been living together.
It sounds to me like she has you right where she wants you, and she knows it. I get the feeling she uses sex and your fetish as a way to get the upper hand on you and she knows that you'll wait to eventually grab the brass ring after that much drama.
I think it's probably time for you to move on. It's true that sex shouldn't be the only thing on which to base a relationship, but it is still a very important thing once it's already been put into play (and by sex, I also include the foot play). You don't deserve to be made to feel bad about being able to fulfill yourself completely. Just because you've been together for so long doesn't mean it's meant to be.
Posts: 2681 | Registered: Mar 2006
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She might not need sex and that is her right but if you do and want it then you will need to make a hard decision. As I said before, sex might not be a large percentage in a relationship but it is a very important percentage none the less. maybe she is acting this way so you will break up with her and she won't feel guilty because you did it and she didn't. I know that's hard to hear for us men but it's a thought. I wish you well man whatever you decide.
-------------------- New Ship but she's got the right name. You treat her like a lady and she'll always bring you home. Posts: 4051 | Registered: Apr 2005
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posted
Sex is not a large percentage? what? are you kidding?. sex is a very large %. once people treat sex as " not that important", problems emerge. problems that break couples.
-------------------- My wife's sweet ass and feet Posts: 2151 | Registered: Nov 2004
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posted
If you read my post is states specifically that it is a very important part even if it isn't a large percentage. My post is clear that sex is very important.
-------------------- New Ship but she's got the right name. You treat her like a lady and she'll always bring you home. Posts: 4051 | Registered: Apr 2005
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It's all a question of choosing for your SELF. It doesn't make sense to choose for somebody who does not want to give what you want, it could even be interpreted as a sort of self denial/sabotage.
Be good to your self!
-------------------- Born again pagan baby, craving the moon, I worship Venus as she swallows me whole. Posts: 514 | Registered: Jul 2007
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