quote:Originally posted by footgirl0226: ok so online gf. How long have you gone out with her? Have u met? I guess I just dont get it. But if u explain I will try to get it.
andrew and i met each other on facebook in early 2008, there was a group of regular posters in a group called 6 degrees and we all became really close despite being scattered all over the world. neither of us were looking for a relationship at all, but it got to the point that neither of us could see ourselves being with anyone else. it was never a difficult decision or a 'sacrifice', neither of us see it that way in the least, and i think i can safely say we both find it really easy to maintain a healthy, trusting relationship despite the distance.
we've been in a formal relationship for about 7 months now, and given that both of us are students its not feasible that we can just pop over to visit each other at will. im spending christmas and new years with him in england, then the plan is he makes the move out to australia in late 2010.
speaking just for myself, i know that to other people our situation may seem strange. my mother for one can NOT understand it, and i think secretly hopes its just a phase, it IS new and it IS different. there are a lot of obstacles in our relationship that arent present in conventional relationships, but we are completely open about everything, even if its awkward or painful to talk about, openness is so essential in a long distance rel and we both work hard to make sure we dont go to bed angry (pointed silences and 'hmphs' dont work too well over msn )
what it comes down to, basically, is that i cant imagine a life without him in the centre of it. i love him he could be from mars and id still do this. its the most 'right' thing ive ever felt in my life.
(i know youre going to read this and call me corny, andrew but XP i dont care haha)
[ May 31, 2009, 05:17 AM: Message edited by: Athena K ]
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-------------------- quote: ---------------------------------- posted by Andy - Laa: my posts in this thread are not as good as Michael P's Posts: 3024 | Registered: Apr 2004
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maybe i'm weird, but i like to have easy access to a chick and don't want to go through the hassle of traveling to meet somebody when i can meet somebody that is just as good if not better than some "e-friend" within 10 minutes of my house
i like physical contact and verbal communication too, not words on a computer screen
i'm not sure how anybody can argue an e-relationship is healthy but then again people these days like to twitter "i'm going to the grocery store to get toilet paper" or some other nonsense so maybe i'm the weird one
-------------------- quote: ---------------------------------- posted by Andy - Laa: my posts in this thread are not as good as Michael P's Posts: 3024 | Registered: Apr 2004
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you guys seemed to be fixated on the idea that an 'online' gf is the point. it's not. its a means to an end. i have no doubt that given the chance that andy and athena could be physically together, they would be. its meant to be a temporary situation until things can be resolved so someone can make the move.
Michael P, you sir, are just thinking with your cock. if you happened to fall in love with someone, you may decide that not getting your rocks off whenever you want may be a trade-off you are willing to make if you could be with someone you truly love.
Footgirl.. sorry hun, but maybe you are just too old.
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if you've already interacted with them in person fine, but how does one "fall in love" just by reading internet words?
-------------------- quote: ---------------------------------- posted by Andy - Laa: my posts in this thread are not as good as Michael P's Posts: 3024 | Registered: Apr 2004
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^ Phone calls not allowed or something, Mike? Video calls? Webcam? And you do realise that MSN is instant messaging, not like on these boards, yeah? So what is the difference how you fall in love? I can't see it...
quote:Originally posted by Andy-Laa: ^ Phone calls not allowed or something, Mike? Video calls? Webcam? And you do realise that MSN is instant messaging, not like on these boards, yeah? So what is the difference how you fall in love? I can't see it...
interacting in person is completely different than any of the things you listed
chatting on msn for example, people can take a little more time to think about what they want to say before hitting "enter", sounds ideal if you have a stuttering problem or get lost for words
the way a person speaks, their voice tone,body language,facial expressions, feeling their body even if it's just a touch on the shoulder all GREATLY influence whether a person is attracted to you or not
none of that can be experienced in an e-relationship, heck the other person might have an odor problem for all you know or be a bad kisser
people can seem cool and confident on the net but put them in front of people they are like a scared child
how is this even debateable?
and aren't there girls in your own continent?
an e-relationship seems to me like it's an infatuation type of thing, since you don't see them in person it makes them more mysterious, which always increases attraction
also it might be a feeling of wanting what you can't have or what isn't always available
-------------------- quote: ---------------------------------- posted by Andy - Laa: my posts in this thread are not as good as Michael P's Posts: 3024 | Registered: Apr 2004
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quote: an e-relationship seems to me like it's an infatuation type of thing
yup, that was me with my wife.. and still is. funny how i have that feeling for/about her after being together for 8 years when i was bored with every other woman i met after a couple of months.
btw, i fell in love with her within a week of talking to her. actually within a week of 'chatting' with her. both of us were in relationships, neither of us wanted a thing except to kill some time online, and we both instantly felt it. dont ask me to explain it because i struggled with it for a long time.. and still to this day i dont like thinkingn about it because it MAKES NO SENSE! i am one of the most logical, even headed, intellectually oriented, non touchy feely guy you could meet and i couldnt control my feelings for her. we met after chatting and voice chatting for about 3 months because we both needed to see if it was 'real'. and oh, was it real. we spent the next 9 months, shuttling back and forth monthly for 3 or 4 day visits until everything was set for her to move. we married one year to the day after met. its been work, just like any other marriage, but we both have been more committed to each other than any previous relationship and we are constantly growing and getting better together.
stop being so closeminded and just realize it can happen. its been proven.
quote:Originally posted by Andy-Laa: Btw - since this guy registered in 10-10-2007...he's mad 3 posts total...two of them on THIS topic.
Yeah - he's Billy-Bullshitter...I can't work out WHY one would lie about this kind of story though O.o...eh - weirdos...
Nah.When someone has three posts and stories don't make sense and they just joined, that is when it looks fishy.He has been here for years.He is just a lurker who has something on his mind.Most of the comments here didn't read what he actually said.
quote: an e-relationship seems to me like it's an infatuation type of thing
yup, that was me with my wife.. and still is. funny how i have that feeling for/about her after being together for 8 years when i was bored with every other woman i met after a couple of months.
btw, i fell in love with her within a week of talking to her. actually within a week of 'chatting' with her. both of us were in relationships, neither of us wanted a thing except to kill some time online, and we both instantly felt it. dont ask me to explain it because i struggled with it for a long time.. and still to this day i dont like thinkingn about it because it MAKES NO SENSE! i am one of the most logical, even headed, intellectually oriented, non touchy feely guy you could meet and i couldnt control my feelings for her. we met after chatting and voice chatting for about 3 months because we both needed to see if it was 'real'. and oh, was it real. we spent the next 9 months, shuttling back and forth monthly for 3 or 4 day visits until everything was set for her to move. we married one year to the day after met. its been work, just like any other marriage, but we both have been more committed to each other than any previous relationship and we are constantly growing and getting better together.
stop being so closeminded and just realize it can happen. its been proven.
sure it can happen, there are exceptions to every rule, some people have been struck by lightning, most have never experienced that
maybe i'm weird but i'll stick with chicks in my area, chicks that i can talk VERBALLY with, look into their eyes, feel their skin, help me "release" tension
maybe i'm completely clueless but that's what i thought a relationship was all about, to each their own
i think most people that did e-relationships will some day meet a person that lives close by, you know somebody actually convenient and will laugh at their e-relationship from the past
-------------------- quote: ---------------------------------- posted by Andy - Laa: my posts in this thread are not as good as Michael P's Posts: 3024 | Registered: Apr 2004
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i agree 100% Michael, most relationships that start online will never amount to anything, but to dismiss them just because they are online is what i am referring to. as you said, lightning does strike people so you cant dismiss it just because it hasnt happened to you.
as for your summation of your idea of a relationship, i agree. all those items are certainly part of what i want in relationship, but there is also an emotional aspect that has nothing to do with physical distance. personally, i believe those qualities you mention are the easy part.
i am not trying to argue that this a route everyone should take to look for a partner, but i would like any prejudice towards such a relationship dropped. maybe its not for you or a million other people, but it does work. i personally could never go to a club/bar and pick some chick up to bang. i, personally, never got that.
quote:Originally posted by nusuth: i agree 100% Michael, most relationships that start online will never amount to anything, but to dismiss them just because they are online is what i am referring to. as you said, lightning does strike people so you cant dismiss it just because it hasnt happened to you.
as for your summation of your idea of a relationship, i agree. all those items are certainly part of what i want in relationship, but there is also an emotional aspect that has nothing to do with physical distance. personally, i believe those qualities you mention are the easy part.
i am not trying to argue that this a route everyone should take to look for a partner, but i would like any prejudice towards such a relationship dropped. maybe its not for you or a million other people, but it does work. i personally could never go to a club/bar and pick some chick up to bang. i, personally, never got that.
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he could be from mars and id still do this. its the most 'right' thing ive ever felt in my life. 
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if you happened to fall in love with someone, you may decide that not getting your rocks off whenever you want may be a trade-off you are willing to make if you could be with someone you truly love.
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