posted
is there some sort of special way to get women to feel comfortable in pleasing and mutual sex.
why will men have sex at anytime but women need to be persuaded into it.
im making generalisations here based on my relationship but why is it women have to be in power and make sex so complicated.
some women even go to the extent of teasing and manipulating. and when your girlfriend is upset with you is she really upsett with you or just playing a game. do you all like to secretely tease your men?
and are footjobs just a way to get a man to beg for more. my idea of women has become tainted and i cant stand my girlfriend at the moment.
plus women like this are the reason i am loosing faith in having a foot fetish:
there are many other clip stores just like this to my amazment are actually legal. its people in the world like this that confuse me and anger me.
no wonder i struggle with me sex life. im probably behaving like a victimised dick all the time. all my life since growing up i have felt like women have messed me around. i try to forget the past and even when i find a girlfriend who actually wants to stay with me and loves me i still dont trust her actions are true and what she says is true.
i dont want to sound like the other guy on here who talks a load of shit but im starting to see where he's coming from. when youre down your whole perspective get distorted.
i may have a lot of issues from my past and i try to forget them. i think i am doing things right but i dont know. i dont even know if i am asking the right questions or i am tuning in on the answers i want to hear because of a selfish bias.
i need to see clearly to be able to trust and get on with women, not just now but for the rest of my life. i dont understand my girlfriends and i just dont see it getting any easier with any woman
posted
yes you make a lot of sense. its great to hear a womans perspective, brilliant.
its not true that i have to have her feet once a week. i would like it more often than i do which is on average once a month.
perhaps im being to pushy and becoming needy and begging makes it worse.
i just dont know, sometimes my girlfriend likes to please me, other times she's just really horrible about it. i end uo craving it and it makes things difficult.
i really need to talk to her. but thank you for pointing me in the right direction!
Posts: 483 | Registered: Jan 2007
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posted
Lamp, I think u need to understand that women are more responsive to physical closeness when they feel emotionally attached. When they do feel emotionally nourished you wont have to pursuade them to have sex, to the contrary you'll find that you may have to push them away !!
As footgirl outlined, trying to pursuade them when they dont feel connected or placing demands or expectations upon them will only backfire on you.
Learn to understand the dynamics and act smart. Pursuade her by fullfilling her emotional needs. Thats a smarter way of achieving your aim. Posts: 461 | Registered: Dec 2002
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there are many other clip stores just like this to my amazment are actually legal. its people in the world like this that confuse me and anger me.
Get used to it. A vast silent majority of foot fetishists happen to be big time losers who have been socially forced into realizing/accepting this perspective. They feel like losers in real life and this genre of niche fits their peg since it hits so much closer to home than a girl being turned on by his foot fetish.
It is sad, but in this world full of judgmental common denominators, it is truth. Good thing though, is that it does not have to be true for the vocal minority (ie. people like us who creep out from our dark corners and confide publicly, yet anonymously enough *LOL* [with others] about our fetish).
quote:Originally posted by lamp: i need to see clearly to be able to trust and get on with women, not just now but for the rest of my life.
If you wanna change this, you need to be the one who is in control rather than controlled. There are many subtle ways to become this. Unfortunately the subject matter is far-reaching and beyond the scope of this thread other than to briefly touch a few overused cliches: ie. "be confident", "create intrigue", "fill her needs", "take control", "be a man", etc. (and many other terms that ring little meaning to guys who basically don't get it).
[ May 05, 2008, 01:36 PM: Message edited by: Tyler D. ]
posted
lamp! i can't fully relate to you.. but i can say this.. i don't get the little things i want as much as i want.
as much as I like feet.. i really appreciate heeled feet and the scent of hosed feet after being in pumps. that is something i don't get enough of. but... i'm not in a position to 'need' it.
what i've learned.. i've poste here many times.. and this thread is repeating it.
i love for my wife to initiate, but this is not her venue of interest.I have linked the feelings I get to venues she likes.. and that helped open her eyes to what I like. example.. she likes strong arms.. and the masculine scent. I linked that to my love of her thighs and butt and the scent of her feet after she wore heels and hose.
after that linking.. it wasn't as weird to her.. and she eased up on 'holding back'. you also have to realize.. to many.. this fetish doesn't make sense.
that said.. footgirl raises some valid points. i have to be creative.. i have to set the tone.. i've got to maintain that emotional closeness... and when that is done.. she is far more open to endulging me. but should that get lost.. what i want becomes much harder to get (meaning.. happens far less frequently!)
the topic is too deep to talk about in one post.. but for me.. that link bothers me but doesn't affect me.. and i avoid such places.. mainly because it' snot my cup of tea!!!!!
as my wife learned that she wasn't the only gal who had a man into feet.. and started reading folks comments here.. it helped. (not recommending it.. because at times folks posts things that can be counter-productive to encouragement)
bottom line.. if your girl feels she has to perform.. her instinct is to prove you wrong. (said very not politically correctly).
i wish you luck with that. and with communication.. hopefully things can change.. and with more confidence (not saying you don't have it)... in time things will change. i mean.. i'm not the best example. but my wife wearing heels.. or taking pics of hosed feet or bare feet wasn't going to happen ever (so she told me). but you can see that has changed.. years later (you've got other examples of fellas here who were patient and got what they wanted.. or more of what they wanted)
but.. if she's not your wife.. and this is a majore sore point for you and even a deal breaker.. you may want to consider changing your perspective and even looking elsewhere.
RPM
p.s. hope this helps.....especially i'm still cooling my jets from prior postings
quote:Originally posted by lamp: perhaps im being to pushy and becoming needy and begging makes it worse.
Unfortunately, this may be part of the problem.
Being needy, pushy and begging will definitely make things worse. That type of behavior is not something women find attractive at all in guys. Since it's unattractive, how do you expect your girlfriend to respond in a positive way, let alone in a way that is congruent with her being attracted to you?
It's important to remember that women enjoy anticipation. Anticipation creates a sexual tension and makes her wonder what's going to happen next. Instead of concentrating on the act of having sex (with her and/or with her feet), you may want to put your effort into teasing her a little bit in a physical way. As an example, say you're both sitting and watching tv. Kiss her once and then pull away and go back to watching tv like nothing happened. Wait a few minutes, watch tv, have conversation, etc., then slowly kiss her again once or twice, then pull back again and resume the conversation and watching tv like you were. Each time you go for a kiss, do just one step more, then lean back and stop. This starting and stopping, rather than going in and trying to get it all right away, builds anticipation in her while slowly escalating touching between the two of you. The end result should be her getting turned on as things progress slowly.
-------------------- "I like feet... A lot!" Posts: 2167 | Registered: Sep 2004
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posted
wow jesus christ, this post has been really really helpfull.
you guys have helped me understand so much where i am going wrong. there are a lot of things i have been doing that i need to change.
that said there are a lot of things my girlfriend needs to change to.
but if i change my behaviour i might just have a chance. ive had some good times in my sexual relationship and some bad ones. perhaps i am very needy when it comes to sex and her feet and i cant help that when im not getting it very often but perhaps if i learn to go about it in the right way all the time we might be able to save our sexual relationship.
at the moment im sitting at my dads house having a few days away from my girlfriend may help us have a little time to chill. i dont think she sees all this as a big deal but hopefully i can go back to her with a positive head and work stuff out.
but if neither of us can work it out and we continue to upsett each other then i am gonna have to end the relationship. its all so much more complex than just a bit of sex.
im just very gratefull for you guys to help me understand. apologise for being so deep and ruining any of the fun moods going around!
im gonna take this time to browse some sexy feet!
Posts: 483 | Registered: Jan 2007
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posted
[/qb][/QUOTE]Oh and since you invited me to Georgia to do a video! lol You would have to be in charge! lmao... Now I have seen some of your videos- are there some on your site where you are REALLY really in charge??? lol ... or just enjoying the hell out of it all? [/QB][/QUOTE]
sorry i dont understand what you're talking about?!
do you do videos footgirl?
Posts: 483 | Registered: Jan 2007
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quote:Originally posted by footgirl0226: Now I have seen some of your videos- are there some on your site where you are REALLY really in charge???
Mind you, my advice did not apply to me. I play the part of a huge foot fetish loser just for the sake of business. Being a foot fetish loser is much more profitable than being a foot fetish winner, LOL! (trust me)
When surfers see a dude in a foot fetish video, they'd rather him be seen and not heard, & basically abused by the mistress instead of in control.
It is very easy to note the top themes that the majority of foot fetishists demand (ie. loserdom): http://www.clips4sale.com/do/list
If Lamp wants to win his girl over in real life, he increases his chances by NOT mimicking the actions of the many loser themes portrayed (or executed) in staged (or real life) foot fetish scenarios. In other words, he must showcase to her his inner-winner mentality
[ May 05, 2008, 07:08 PM: Message edited by: Tyler D. ]
Posts: 4487 | Registered: Dec 2005
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quote:Originally posted by footgirl0226: Really? See- I must not have a foot fetish at all cause I would want to see the exact opposite.
I'm gonna let you in on a little secret from the boys club: "Women with foot fetishes are posers compared to real men with foot fetishes"
...in other words, they don't have as much working clout when used as examples in the discussion or demonstration of real life fetish solutions.
Posts: 4487 | Registered: Dec 2005
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"Women with foot fetishes are posers compared to 
