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Well im sure some of you on here know i hate having a foot fetish but iv tried to get along and meet someone but quite simply having a foot fetish is making it near imossible to have a healthy happy relationship.
I was dating a girl who was ok with it and kept it secret but problems still arouse she was obviously not into it when i asked to kiss her feet and as iv stated before i have a very strong ff but most times she wanted to just get naked and screw where as i need feet to get aroused or at least some foreplay which is really fucking me up as most girls expect you to be able to just screw on the spot.
The relationship ended because it wasn't working out and iv once again gone back to my ex but now even she gets annoyed with foreplay and says it turns her off.
If i got aroused over wet pussy id be very happy as im decent looking and have no trouble attracting girls but i simply cant deliver the goods and its driving me crazy, im seriously at a point where im thinking i think nobody will stay with me and i will be alone, tbh i wouldnt give a shit if i died, its making me so miserable.
-------------------- I want you to sit on my chest, and then rest you lusciuos Soles on my face Posts: 245 | Registered: Jul 2004
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Iunno man sounds like your meetin the wrong women or not being open enough about it. I find the weirder you are about it the weirder they will be.
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if the girl likes you she wont care. My girl says he it doesnt do anything for her, but I still do it every time we have sex. which is every day practically. I suck on her toes, and smash her soles into my face when we go at it. Its great. But you have to find the right girl i guess. I had one ex, where we were messin around, and she was standing on the bed taking her clothes off. I grabbed her foot, and she pulled it away like, no my toes are ugly dont look at them. Im like what are you talking about, and she said I hate people touching my feet. Dont do it. I actually stayed with her for a while, and just didnt get any feet action.
Posts: 101 | Registered: Jan 2008
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quote:Originally posted by ThisisMe373: ...but quite simply having a foot fetish is making it near imossible to have a healthy happy relationship.
Alot of what you've said has hit very close to home with me.
It was only til recently that I was able to overcome my disdain for regular sexual activity, but I am still far from normal even though I am slowly able to incorporate those aspects at a snails pace.
I would shy from the normal sexual intimacies when it came time to do so with girls and it was usually the girls who were unexposed to the fetish lifestyle that would generally end the relationship sooner due to incompatibility. Heck, even with the girls who were somewhat or even greatly exposed to the foot fetish ideas, they still ended things with me eventually just due to the sexual intimacy factors that were lacking in the normal department.
I could not get myself to pursue those normal sexual adaptations due to erection failures. This became very problematic for me with any girl who I became more and more intimate with over time. I often wondered to myself, would I be a freak for life?!?!?! Heck, what would family and long time friends think of me if I became some lonely old man who could not seem to have offspring, much less a life partner.
All these things became of more concern to me, cuz I did not want to be further ostracised in people's perceptions, especially people who did not know about my fetish. However, I knew this would become the case as time went on and coworkers, long time friends, and family would eventually catch on to the fact that I could not have a life partner or even produce offspring. They would eventually know something is wrong with me even though they may not have known about my fetish persay.
Anyway, it has been a long time personal search for me to find a path to fixing these problems and only in the past year or so have I even been able to start to make mileage toward progress. I am able to incorporate normal sex into my fantasies and desires and in fact, will have more and more the desire to perform these things with women who I become intimate with.
And in fact, it was yesterday morning that I had a fantasy where I was imagining more normal sex than perverted fetish stuff. I have slowly come a long way since more than a year ago.
It used to be the only things I ever wanted at all were feet in the face and getting my head stepped on and bounced on and having a girl rub her soles or toes under my shaft til I spilled the milk.
Well, lemme tellya boyz, there is the possibility to get on God's intended track. I've managed to do it somehow through persistance and slowly incorporating those normal sexual ideas into my personal fantasies slowly and more and more over time. It is not easy to do and I think there are perspectives and methodologies that greatly assist in this personal journey toward recovery.
quote:Originally posted by ThisisMe373: i have a very strong ff but most times she wanted to just get naked and screw where as i need feet to get aroused or at least some foreplay which is really fucking me up as most girls expect you to be able to just screw on the spot
Oh yes, I know exactly your feeling and it was this type of notion that made me realize I would never experience my sexual desires in real life if I only lived my life in a fantasy world. I needed to live my life for real and be adaptable in real life sexual scenarios.
I quickly realized that fake fantasy BS was the root cause of all my dilemnas (after all those lonely/decieved years) and I had to act quick to somehow start framing things from a more realistic perspective in order to take the "gray" out of real life.
This specific tactic that I employed (of truly framing things from a realist's perspective) almost exactly coincided with the time in my life where I started to make slow progress toward normalcy about a year ago. I have since come a long way, but i have not eliminated my fetish, but I have allowed the good from two different worlds to complement and co-exist.
By simply dropping all preconceived notions about myself and losing all false senses of security that I had, I was able to see myself and the world point blank. I accepted reality and I especially employed this idea in my sexual thoughts, even to the point where sometimes it might not have contained all the self-glorification that most men seek on some level.
Over time, this mental coupling that I had with reality sort of made the fake fantasy world seem false and unachievable and therefore less appealing. When I acquired a greater taste for reality it also conditioned my mind to play out scenarios that were more probable in the real world and as a result I also imagined the pleasure that females would get when I was pleasing them in a normal sexual capacity.
I firmly believe that this imaginitive tie that I nurtured toward reality is directly correlated to my upward progress toward normalcy. I am not saying I am perfect, cuz I still have a lot of perverted things that I still like and imagine, but after many MANY years, I have finally found myself wanting to do normal things with women that I have had no interest in doing in years past.
I hope this makes some sense and I hope maybe this will help get you on a slow path to recovery.
Some advice. I find that getting off to pics of feet conditions one's mind to be aroused by that stimulus. Get off to porn instead of feet. Sounds crazy. But it helped me alot. Stay away from foot fetish websites...they only make your fetish stronger. I found this out during basic training when I didn't see a bare female foot for two months. When I graduated the only thing I wanted sex. Feet was still a turn on, but the idea of sexually dominating a woman was far more tempting than anything she could do with her feet. It wasn't until a month later when life started to normalize did I check out wus and other favorites to catch up on what I had missed. Conditioning myself back.
Watching mainstream porn isn't as interesting as watching your fav foot model at first...but just try it. After awhile it'll be more interesting and when game time comes around you'll be more prepared. Get those feet that you havn't seen in your face while you're inside of her and she'll love the reaction.
good luck!
-------------------- If she won't indulge your fetish, I bet you that cuter, smarter girl across the bar will. Lets go find out. Posts: 1877 | Registered: Aug 2006
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posted
Both Tyler D. and GQguy have some very profound insights here. I can't more strongly urge you to consider it deeply and apply it.
Stop thinking of being a foot-fetishist as your first attribute. You are fundamentally a sexual being; your fondness for women's feet is merely a part of your sexual make-up. Well, it should be.
There is more to a woman than her feet (if you don't get that, you are really missing out). Moreover, there just has to be more to you than an obsession with women's feet; surely you have interests beyond women's feet. Time to focus on those. Further still, have you ever considered entertaining the woman's needs and forsaking yours? Try getting her off and stop worrying about your needs; the rewards for this approach are immeasurable.
Finally, I have been reading and responding to your posts for more than a year and a half. The absolute, primary, foremost item on your life's agenda is to get that fucking "ex" out of your life. Forever...NEVER see her, talk to her, or, in any way, interact with her. If you don't put her in your past immediately, you are a Masochist - not a foot fetishist. You might as well proceed to the nearest S/M parlor so that shrieking women can shove large objects in your ass while hanging weights from your balls and extinguishing cigarettes on your nipples.
Your life will improve remarkably when the "ex" is gone and you stop putting feet first.
Here's a toast to your efforts.
Posts: 5067 | Registered: Apr 2005
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posted
Yeah, try avoiding as many feet as possible and see how you do, but it's sad that this fetish can sometimes have a negative impact on people's entire lives!
It's made me realise my kink probably isn't nearly as strong as most on here.
-------------------- There is nothing more heavenly than the smell of a female foot ^_^
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Remember this communication is the key. If you think you are strange or wierd then you will project that to people. if you are confident about who and what you like then you will project that to people. there will always be people who will be unexposed to things that others are not. When you talk about what is normal sex do you just mean straight intercourse. remember people develop desires from practice. The first person who stuck their shaft between two breasts do you think that they knoew whether or not that was normal sex? Of course not they were just open to trying something different and they probably liked it. You like women that have pretty feet? O.k. some people like women that have nice hair or, beautiful teeth or a nice backside or pretty skin and on and on and on and on. Anything that is appealing to the eye can be cultivated the more time that is spent on it. Balance is where we need to strive towards because if we are in a relationship then we should want to please our mates first and in turn be pleased as well. There are some women who just will not give their spouses/bf oral sex. Why beacuse they are closed off to the idea or maybe had a bad experiecne or maybe have been taught all their life that it is a bad thing. We are all at some level a product of our upbringing. As we search out life for ourselves we find things that maybe we were taught are not right for us because remember it is all cyclical. your parents taught what they were taught with maybe some variations because of things they discovered and they were taught by their parents and it works backward all the way back to the beginning of your lineage. Open communication will save alot of heartache IMO later then thiking you have to hide the fact and then feel you have to sneak up on some foot play it will never be truly fulfilling in that scenario. You amy find that there are some women who will just not be open to it and then you just move on because for every woman who is not into it you will find one that is open to it. I have heard may people say they hate feet and when I ask them why, they usually don't have an answer. it's a learned behavior just anything else that people have aversions to. Just some thoughts and sorry if I took up to much space or time.
-------------------- New Ship but she's got the right name. You treat her like a lady and she'll always bring you home. Posts: 4051 | Registered: Apr 2005
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quote:Originally posted by Sinnister: A lot of this has to do with age.
Im guessing you're under 25?
Younger women often = terrible sex partners.
They do what they think they should instead of what you want.
Sex with "older" women is so much better! They love it, and know how to get themselves off making my job soooo much easier. Older women tend to be more generous than my "it's all about me" age mates. And they're far more open to things like foot fetishes.
You said normal porn doesn't do it for you? Ok, I can identify. Try not relieving yourself for a few days. Workout during this sexual fast. No looking at feet pics/vids either. When you feel like you're about to explode go to youporn.com or whatever and treat yourself to some mainstream stuff. I always enjoy it. Funny, I think my foot fetish is more a habit and a comfort thing than anything else. While my real passion is released when having sex. Start this habit. This will help when you start having sex. When you do have sex and it's a good experience you'll look at it differently. The foot fetish thing is all mental because feet just don;t feel as good as sex does yet our mind tells us otherwise. Once you ave a positive experience with sex it'll get better. Try an older women....they can be pretty good.
good luck
GQguy
-------------------- If she won't indulge your fetish, I bet you that cuter, smarter girl across the bar will. Lets go find out. Posts: 1877 | Registered: Aug 2006
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posted
Good sex is vital for a healthy happy relationship. As guys whose primary interest is feet, we must make sure that we satisfy our women sexually. Once the sex dies, the relationship does too.....
GQguy
-------------------- If she won't indulge your fetish, I bet you that cuter, smarter girl across the bar will. Lets go find out. Posts: 1877 | Registered: Aug 2006
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