Hey guys, looking for some advice. I'm 20 year olds and this fetish started soon as i was going through puberty. Problem is ever since then i have not been interested in anything else but nice looking female feet. I thought as i got older interests such as sex would start but it seems ive missed it and all that turns me on is feet. Because of this i havnt dated a girl and ive even turned down sex from some real hotties by telling them lame excuses like im waiting for the right one. Ive turned them down because i have no idea what to do as ive only ever watched foot fetish stuff and thats all that appeals to me. Ive never told anyone this and people are starting to question why i dont have a girlfriend when they've seen lots that are interested in me. I cant keep going on like this is there anyway i can cure this fetish or keep it but be interested in other parts of girls. Ive been thinking to myself that mabye i should just go along with it and have sex, even though i have zero interest in it. Ive forced myself to watch porn but it does nothing for me(most of it i think is gross which is also a worry). Mabye if i just expirienced it i would enjoy it? any advice would be much appreciated.
Posted by Joanne (Member # 24406) on :
really, dont push yourself to have sex. im 24 years old and i am saving myself for marraige. i dont believe in sex before marraige...so thats probably what you want too but just dont know it.
do not push yourself, sex will be much better if you find someone, makeout (kiss, foot fetish etc), get married then have sex.
i dont think i could have sex with someone, then get married to someone else down the line, then expect to have a sex with them too without thinking about the sex i had before....i know its maybe just me, and the way my mind works.
Posted by barney (Member # 8592) on :
it's a challenge but at some point you'll need to look further than their feet. Don't be too worried about not bonking - don't do it if you don't want to. I agree, porn stuff looks quite degrading sometimes so it's a good thing if your not turned on by it. Mate, just go past the foot stuff and shag whatever is on offer - it all adds to wiser decisions in the future.
Posted by GQguy (Member # 16534) on :
I used to be the same way. Alot of it is mental conditioning. Like pavlovs dog where he rand a bell and fed the dog. After a while after he rang the bell the dog would salivate expecting food. Same thing with your foot fetish. You see feet on your computer screen and (i'm assuming) you "treat" your body. Now your mind connects sexual pleasure with feet. Not a big deal except that women love sex and you're missing out! ;o) I wouldn't suggest having your first time with just anyone, but I do suggest trying it and relaxing. It took me a few women before I started enjoying sex and now i'd turn down a footjob over sex anyday...unless I was tired lol. Have you ever been intimate with a woman in any way? I don't understand this turning women down thing. Are you saying "no I don't have sex" when they say hi? Or are you both in the throws of passion when you tell her the news. My advice is to first relax. You're ok. Hangout with some of these women. When the time is right get physical. Do your best to please her. And when it's her turn let her know what does it for you. If she complains that you don't want to have sex leave her alone. Odds are she's only 20 like you and that sort of attitude at that age is not healthy. After hooking up with the girl you really like start experimenting. Soon you'll start to associate sexual pleasure with other parts of the female body and then you'll be more interested in having sex. In the end don't stress about it. All of this should be fun! You're not the only one. GQguy
Posted by Brandy's Foot Slave (Member # 20905) on :
Honestly Bro, First of all, You can't cure a fetish it's ingrained in you like the rest of us here, embrace it. Secondly don't get yourself all worked up about things like sex nobody knows what to do the first time and nobody is good at it right away. Like GQ said its alot of mental conditioning, you need to gradually work yourself into it...you'll be alright bro, Hang in there!
Posted by Cain (Member # 8492) on :
Use the foot play as foreplay and then work your way to sex trust me a foot job is great but it does not feel like a vagina. Just channel your feelings and if a girl has great feet you are gonna want to do more than just foot play.
Posted by Karas (Member # 23934) on :
Hold off on it until your ready. For some people sex is better till you wait, for others its not. But in either case it's not something you can rush.
A big part of it is your mental conditioning. Ask any psychologist and they will say its very, VERY easy for a person with any fetish to lose interest in conventional sex because of their fetish. So if you look at feet only, and when you pleasure yourself and thats all your looking at, then the result over time will become that.
Keep yourself in check. Don't over indulge your fetish. Zen wisdom teaches that you should have a simple relationship with everything. And sex is no exception. If you over indulge it you could face problems, since you probably have a good chance of finding a woman who is down with your fetish. Maybe not totally down, but a damn good chance she'll compromise to some extent with it. But the thing there is no compromise is that you have to be able to pleasure her.
So in short don't train yourself to respond to certain things only. Keep yourself in check and you should be cool.
Posted by Keyfeet (Member # 27313) on :
don't worry, you are doing a whole lot of good by not having sex before marrige. you dont want an STD, anyway, who cares what people think, tell girls about your foot fetish and if they dont except it, move on to the next one. Personalitly and love is way better than sex to me.
Posted by Tyler D. (Member # 11452) on :
get footjobs instead, they are great.
me, i like to lick and sniff a girls feet and then when it makes me nice and hard, i like to rub her soles on my weenie until i shoot a nice hot load for her.
maybe try that if you can't cum via regular sex. i have had that latter problem for many years now. don't think i accumulated it as early as you though, but that is the method how i work around it... footjobs basically Posted by Sinnister (Member # 2394) on :
What in the...
Dude, fuck the first girl who let's you. It's the law! Just kidding. Don't beat yourself up over it. You'll find that perfect girl who you will WANT to have sex with. Trust me.
Posted by Sabbath (Member # 4844) on :
I had the same problem some years ago, I just started to making out more often, and started enjoying girls as a whole and not just the feet. Don't listen to the " wait for the right one" ; " wait for marriage" people if you want to overcome your fears you just have to relax and let it go. ( use a condom if you're afraid of STDs)
Posted by ThisisMe373 (Member # 2340) on :
hi im 20 also, iv had that problem but if you just relax in the situation & enjoy you'll losen up & see you like more than just feet, but if you try to force yourself into liking other things & getting hard it basically wont happen, i also find alot of porn disgusting, but when your there yourself & the girls touching you, its different, try it out mate, & btw don't turn down hotties, you'll regret it when your older lol.
Posted by russ (Member # 10866) on :
quote:Originally posted by Joanne: really, dont push yourself to have sex. im 24 years old and i am saving myself for marraige. i dont believe in sex before marraige...so thats probably what you want too but just dont know it.
do not push yourself, sex will be much better if you find someone, makeout (kiss, foot fetish etc), get married then have sex.
i dont think i could have sex with someone, then get married to someone else down the line, then expect to have a sex with them too without thinking about the sex i had before....i know its maybe just me, and the way my mind works.
What if you get married and the sex is awful? And yeah I'm not married, I'm 21 and have had sex with several girls, and remember it, but I don't think about them if I am getting physical with another girl. Also have you thought about how you'll will probably be curious about what sex with a different person is like? I'm not bashing your stance on pre-marital sex, I'm just throwing out some points-of-view that maybe you hadn't considered yet. Because when I lost my virginity I thought it was a huge deal and me and my GF at the time thought about it and discussed it before we did it. We were doing pretty much everything else besides actual intercourse so it wasn't like a huge jump. After having sex i realized it's not as big of a deal as i thought it was. I don't think I could marry someone without having sex first. just my opinion.
Posted by rks3701 (Member # 27130) on :
go get some help
Posted by Wing-Washer (Member # 3013) on :
quote:Originally posted by rks3701: go get some help
What an insightful and well articulated contribution.
To the OP, I completely agree with Brandy's Foot Slave.
Regarding your concern about finding porn gross: I'm kind of the same way - porn does almost nothing for me if there's a penis in the scene.
Posted by scrunchlover (Member # 21542) on :
Just accept yourself, however you are.
Posted by ThisisMe373 (Member # 2340) on :
i had a bad experience 2day, i had sex with a girl and couldn't get it up for awhile but then started imagining all my fantasies to do with feet ect while having sex, truest me it keeps you hard.
Posted by octoberbaseball (Member # 20977) on :
I would say try to incorporate sex into your foot fetish. For instance have sex in missionary position and have her feet in your face.
Posted by Toetapper (Member # 6473) on :
Well! Quite a variety of opinions, here. Guess I'll throw in my two cent's worth (and that's all it's worth, as the dollar continues to decline overseas).
My notion is to recommend that you simply throw yourself into it - the same way you would jump into a pool not knowing if it is heated. You'll emerge either shrieking or elated...but you'll get out of that pool and know there are others in the neighborhood into which you should jump, as well.
Enough with the metaphors. As my Grandmother would say, "Kid, you don't know what you're missin'". Try it. I suspect the entanglement of bare skin will bring out the passion in you; hormones and natural biological urges should take care of the rest. Will you be magnificent the first time out? "Signs point to No." It's the first step of the learning process and you have to start somewhere. (OK, I've got to make a quick reference to swimming: You can only talk about swimming so long before you actually have to get in the water)
Suggestions: Don't over-think this...just allow it to unfold. The more questions you ask yourself the more doubt you'll develop. Save analysis for later. Save, too, foot-play for later, make the connection first; your "quirks" will be more likely to be indulged once she is comfortable with you (this might help you become more comfortable with yourself).
There is an old saying among equestrians that the first thing one must do after falling off a horse is to get back on. It is time for you to hop on so that you can fall off.
Then again, I should probably shut up.
Posted by ashifechi (Member # 16477) on :
Dude, try taking some 5-HTP, or something of the sort.
My wife accuses me of only thinking about feet, but that is not true. Her and I are having some issues with each other.
I think about pussy a lot.
If you are only focusing on feet then youmight want to find some type of way to foacus elsewhere.
Maybe you should find a dominant girl. There are societies you can join to meet people of alternate interests.
Maybe a dominant girl might force you to please her and offer her feet as a reward for pleasing her. Maybe that will spark an interest in other parts of the female anatomy.
Posted by feetluvr (Member # 1570) on :
quote:Originally posted by octoberbaseball: I would say try to incorporate sex into your foot fetish. For instance have sex in missionary position and have her feet in your face.
Great suggestion. It sounds to me like you're just scared of what's going to happen once you're underway. Do you think you'd have difficulty having regular sex as long as you can see, feel or touch her feet while doing it?
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