Hello folks! I completely forgot about this site for the longest time, but I'm glad I rediscovered it. I've got a new foot situation I'm dealing with, obviously involving a new female in my life. Allow me to shed a brief background to the situation:
I met this great new girl at work (I'm 23 and she's 20). We hit it off very well. We've now been dating for almost two months. We have somewhat of a unique situation in that we aren't currently having sex. This is probably why I haven't introduced the feet thing into the relationship yet. Typically, I don't have a very hard time introducing it. I'm a lot more comfortable with it than I was in the past, partially due to talking with you guys on this site in the past. So the reason we aren't having sex at the moment is because I informed her that I have HPV and I don't want to transfer it to her. So she's in the process of getting vacinated (a 6 month process). I also thought that if the relationship were going to be healthy, waiting six months can't do anything but strengthen the reason we want to be together.
So tonight we went to the movies with a friend of her's and her boyfriend. I'd heard that this boyfriend once "took her socks off and kissed her feet," from my girlfriend. Apparently her friend told her about it, and my gf asked me if I thought it was weird at all. I told her "no, it's quite normal to me." So at the movies I see him constantly checking out his gf's feet and she's placing them on his lap. So by the end of the night I bring it up to my gf that I know something about her friend's boyfriend that she probably doesn't know, and I can figure it out just by looking at what happened at the movies. She's very curious at this point. So I inform her that he has a foot fetish and she doesn't act surprised at all.
This leads to the conversation later in the night, when I tell her I have something I want to tell her about myself; something that I really like and she needs to know about. At this point, she guesses right. I like feet. Unfortunately, I don't know if she reacted well to it. She's the first gf I've had that thinks it's a bit "odd." I suppose it is what it is, but I don't think it's too crazy. She's a very self-conscious person. So the fact that her hands and feet often sweat, she finds her own feet to be somewhat gross, even though she admits "I don't hate feet or anything, it's just that mine sweat a lot and it's gross." So at this point, I want to tell her that I don't care if they sweat. Hell, I'm kind of curious what they smell like! haha. She even tells me that she really loves to wear socks and shoes, because she just feels safe with them on. I have no idea what that means, but it sucks for me. I didn't want to come off as too "out there" on the first conversation about it, so I just let it go. She had to leave anyways, so I figured I'd bring it up the next time I see her (tomorrow). The strange thing is that I don't think she feels her feet are gross, other than the sweating thing. It's not the typical "ewww, my feet are gross, you're a freak," type of reaction. (Not that that's a common reaction to begin with) It's like she has a legitimate reason in her mind for why her feet are gross. She does indeed sweat a lot on the hands, feet, and lower back. I personally don't care about that, but it's a huge deal to her. I imagine she thinks me kissing sweaty parts of her body is disgusting. I suppose I can understand that, if I put myself in the female's perspective.
Sorry about the length of the post.
Does anyone have any advice for me in this situation? I can tell you right now that I have a lot of positive things going for me in the situation, outside of her stance on her own feet. She and I REALLY like each other at the moment. Her feet aren't ticklish or anything, and they actually are quite attractive (other than the sweating thing, in her eyes). Additionally, I tihnk it's a positive thing that one of her good friend's has a bf who has the same fetish. It seems like a good way for her to learn about it, without having to even hear it from me. I only hope I can get her to overcome this self conscious behavior that's causing me to stress out about this.
[ July 16, 2008, 04:39 AM: Message edited by: Acedeck ]
Posted by footjoyboy (Member # 26478) on :
First of all, it would help to know what you mean by 'HPV'. Is that Herpes?
Secondly, she has probably never been around a guy who knew how to utilize her feet. I think she is just putting up a defense mechanism; in reality she want's you to like her feet. Give it a try.
_fjb_ Posted by whyme (Member # 29265) on :
quote:Originally posted by Acedeck: Hello folks! I completely forgot about this site for the longest time, but I'm glad I rediscovered it. I've got a new foot situation I'm dealing with, obviously involving a new female in my life. Allow me to shed a brief background to the situation:
I met this great new girl at work (I'm 23 and she's 20). We hit it off very well. We've now been dating for almost two months. We have somewhat of a unique situation in that we aren't currently having sex. This is probably why I haven't introduced the feet thing into the relationship yet. Typically, I don't have a very hard time introducing it. I'm a lot more comfortable with it than I was in the past, partially due to talking with you guys on this site in the past. So the reason we aren't having sex at the moment is because I informed her that I have HPV and I don't want to transfer it to her. So she's in the process of getting vacinated (a 6 month process). I also thought that if the relationship were going to be healthy, waiting six months can't do anything but strengthen the reason we want to be together.
So tonight we went to the movies with a friend of her's and her boyfriend. I'd heard that this boyfriend once "took her socks off and kissed her feet," from my girlfriend. Apparently her friend told her about it, and my gf asked me if I thought it was weird at all. I told her "no, it's quite normal to me." So at the movies I see him constantly checking out his gf's feet and she's placing them on his lap. So by the end of the night I bring it up to my gf that I know something about her friend's boyfriend that she probably doesn't know, and I can figure it out just by looking at what happened at the movies. She's very curious at this point. So I inform her that he has a foot fetish and she doesn't act surprised at all.
This leads to the conversation later in the night, when I tell her I have something I want to tell her about myself; something that I really like and she needs to know about. At this point, she guesses right. I like feet. Unfortunately, I don't know if she reacted well to it. She's the first gf I've had that thinks it's a bit "odd." I suppose it is what it is, but I don't think it's too crazy. She's a very self-conscious person. So the fact that her hands and feet often sweat, she finds her own feet to be somewhat gross, even though she admits "I don't hate feet or anything, it's just that mine sweat a lot and it's gross." So at this point, I want to tell her that I don't care if they sweat. Hell, I'm kind of curious what they smell like! haha. She even tells me that she really loves to wear socks and shoes, because she just feels safe with them on. I have no idea what that means, but it sucks for me. I didn't want to come off as too "out there" on the first conversation about it, so I just let it go. She had to leave anyways, so I figured I'd bring it up the next time I see her (tomorrow). The strange thing is that I don't think she feels her feet are gross, other than the sweating thing. It's not the typical "ewww, my feet are gross, you're a freak," type of reaction. (Not that that's a common reaction to begin with) It's like she has a legitimate reason in her mind for why her feet are gross. She does indeed sweat a lot on the hands, feet, and lower back. I personally don't care about that, but it's a huge deal to her. I imagine she thinks me kissing sweaty parts of her body is disgusting. I suppose I can understand that, if I put myself in the female's perspective.
Sorry about the length of the post.
Does anyone have any advice for me in this situation? I can tell you right now that I have a lot of positive things going for me in the situation, outside of her stance on her own feet. She and I REALLY like each other at the moment. Her feet aren't ticklish or anything, and they actually are quite attractive (other than the sweating thing, in her eyes). Additionally, I tihnk it's a positive thing that one of her good friend's has a bf who has the same fetish. It seems like a good way for her to learn about it, without having to even hear it from me. I only hope I can get her to overcome this self conscious behavior that's causing me to stress out about this.
Bloody hell, thats SUCH A LONG post about a feet topic.
Talk about dedication Posted by Acedeck (Member # 3298) on :
Haha, at least I said sorry for the length!
As for FJB, HPV is the human pappalonavirus. It's something that basically only shows symptoms on females (except a couple types which cause genital warts), in the form of pre-cancerous cervical lesions. I'm pretty sure I have it because my last gf was tested and had the high risk type (which causes cancer). It transfers on skin contact, so a condom doesn't do a whole lot to protect against it. So I wanted to be careful with the new girlfriend and get her vaccinated.
I kind of have an update on the situation, if anyone crazy enough read this post after seeing how long it was. haha.
She doesn't think it's "that weird." She was just giving me a hard time about it because she thought it was funny. She says she's pretty open about stuff. Though she still has this weird thing about wanting to wear socks, because they make her "feel safe." Hopefully I can break her of that.
Posted by Yogi (Member # 581) on :
She has hyperhydrosis (Plantar/Palmer) Excessive sweaty palms and feet. My wife is currently undergoing medical treatment for it. But it has always been harder for her to deal with than me. I have never had a problem with it. My wife lives in flip flops 24-7 out side of work. She'll come around bro. YOGI
Posted by Acedeck (Member # 3298) on :
That sounds exactly what she has. Though, she's like that from head to toe. Her back, neck, face, legs, hands, feet all sweat real bad. The good thing is that it's not salty or nasty sweat, like I would normally associate with someone who sweats that much. It really doesn't bother me at all.
She says she likes to wear socks, so I came up with a compromise with her. I told her to start wearing nylons, as I also have a bit of a nylon fetish. That way she can still feel secure, but I also get to enjoy seeing her feet in nylons. It's working out a lot better than I thought it was going to. She's actually very open about the whole foot thing, as well as the nylon thing.
Posted by Yogi (Member # 581) on :
Sweet! Posted by octoberbaseball (Member # 20977) on :
Interesting how she would want to wear socks. Wouldn't they make her feet sweat even more? In my opinion I don't think you should have told her about your foot fetish I think you should have just started actions. I have told girls in the past that I'm interested in feet and it leads to the negative comebacks we are all familiar with. I say the way to tell her would have been just to massage her feet if you had the chance and see where that leads to. Also I hope all is well with you and the condition of your health and your gf's health. Best wishes.
Posted by LuckyTeen (Member # 30822) on :
Yeah, NEVER use the term fetish to describe anything today lol. At best just say 'kink' or turn on.
Actions speak louder than words, just massage her feet, if she likes it and gets more comfortable give her toes a little kiss. Posted by slimebass (Member # 1409) on :
Yeah, if you just make it natural it's more likely to suceed. A girl will probably not mind if you kiss their neck,back, shoulder etc. as long as you eventually get down to the buisness at hand. Make the feet just a whim on your journey.
Posted by Acedeck (Member # 3298) on :
Oh, actions happened a long time ago. I just brought it to the forefront after I realized that one of her friend's boyfriend had a foot fetish. I thought it was the ideal opportunity to bring it up. I already knew a long time ago that she was comfortable with me touching her feet, which is a very good sign for starting out. Most girls that don't accept your foot fetish won't even let you mess with their feet to begin with.
To me, it's not as much about how it's brought up. I think a lot has to do with where it goes from there. If you can ease her into it, I don't think it matters how it comes out in the beginning. I think I've almost got her to think nothing of it. Tonight I got her to take her socks off for me, and she was fine with me just playing with her feet with my hands. She's opening up.
Posted by LuckyTeen (Member # 30822) on :
Yeah that;s 100% true my friend, I would have done the same in that situation where I can see a fellow foot lover, I wouldn't feel bad telling her I'd gladly take her shoes of and kiss her feet either.
It's true if women can push past the fact that it's feet and let them be pampered, I'd guess only the extremely ticklish ones wouldn't enjoy foot fetish, I mean here you have a girl whom you know is self-conscious about her feet and you have managed to coax her. I have said before my GF hates feet, and hers being touched, she let me when she felt comfortable enough, but she can't deny how good it feels. Shame some people aren't willing to try.
Posted by A&F_FootDude_05 (Member # 2999) on :
quote:Originally posted by LuckyTeen: Yeah, NEVER use the term fetish to describe anything today lol. At best just say 'kink' or turn on.
Good point - I would never use the word 'fetish' until she uses it, and that's after I know she's okay with it.
Posted by Toetapper (Member # 6473) on :
First, I want to commend you for your concern for her as regards your HPV. Not a lot of guys would be as patient. It also speaks well of her that she would undergo the inoculations necessary for intimacy; she could have decided that it was too much bother and sailed off into the sunset. Clearly, she is making a commitment to you and, I think, bodes well for you as a couple.
As for advice, I think that the best that you can do is let her understand that you are comfortable with her overly-sweaty condition (if, in fact she has one - she may simply be hyper-critical of herself and a tad insecure). I'd save the notion that you are possibly intrigued by the scents that might arise from her sweatiness till later. She needs to get adjusted to the whole idea of "feet-are-sexy" before being exposed to the whole gamut of nuances of the fetish.
Having just used the word "fetish", I concur that using it with her is probably a bad idea. The word itself is "clinical-sounding" and has overtones that aren't exactly positive...at least to the uninitiated.
Hope this helps.
Posted by justdaone (Member # 16096) on :
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At best just say 'kink' or turn on.![[Cool]](cool.gif)
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It's working out a lot better than I thought it was going to. She's actually very open about the whole foot thing, as well as the nylon thing.
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