I know the dangers I open myself up to posting this on the forum, but I don't know where else to go. I’ve suspected for some time now that my wife has been cheating on me.
The usual signs… Phone rings but if I answer, the caller hangs up. My wife has been going out with the girls a lot recently although when I ask their names she always says, “Just some friends from work, you don’t know them.”
I always stay awake to look out for her taxi coming home, but she always walks down the drive. Although I can hear a car driving off, as if she has gotten out of the car round the corner. Why? Maybe she wasn’t in a taxi?
I once picked her cell phone up just to see what time it was and she went berserk and screamed that I should never touch her phone again and why was I checking up on her.
Anyway, I have never approached the subject with my wife I think deep down I just didn’t want to know the truth, but last night she went out again and I decided to really check on her.
I decided I was going to park my motorcycle next to the garage and then hide behind it so I could get a good view of the whole street when she came home. It was at that moment, crouching behind my bike , that I noticed that the valve covers on my engine seemed to be leaking a little oil. Is this something I can fix myself or should I take it back to the dealer?
Posted by imation_pc (Member # 1480) on :
lol
Posted by Mr.Papers (Member # 3205) on :
lmao that was a good one. At first I was gonna suggest calling joey greko from cheaters.....you got me
Posted by FootLongSub Zero (Member # 19380) on :
Yay!!!! I didn't get it Posted by A&F_FootDude_05 (Member # 2999) on :
Don't feel bad FootLong...I didn't get it either.
Posted by bison4me (Member # 21530) on :
Footlong and A&F I believe Brooke's BF's real issue here is his motorcycle. Plus given the fact that he's Brooke's Boy Friend, I doubt he's married, and if he is and its not to Brooke, well then we really couldn't blame his wife for cheating on him now could we?
And it was probably her who cut his oil valve lines on the motorcycle. Great stuff Brooke's BF, excellent journalistic slight of hand.:-)
Posted by Tyler D. (Member # 11452) on :
perhaps her new bo is a handyman in more ways than one. 1st you'll need to get his contact information. the best way to do this is to pry it out of your wife, but chances are she will not just come out and admit to it, much less give you his contact information in order for you to find out if he knows anything about motorcycles.
try this: send your wife a cutsie love note to her work from an anonymous person (type written, not hand written). make the subject matter very generic like:
quote:"i love the time we've been spending together
-yours truly"
if she says nothing to you when she comes home, it is a bad sign. she should naturally think it is you, if you are the only one, and if she was not cheating, that is probably something odd enough she would share with you if she is getting an anonymous note like that and she's not involved with anyone.
if she comes home & assumes it's you, u won't have a potential handyman to help fix your bike. if she does not come home and confront you about the note, then you wait to confront her on day two...
have a candle-lit dinner ready for her when she comes home from work the following day. also have a duplicate of the note placed on the table with an open envelope showing it was delivered to your home address.
when she sits down and reads it, take a moment to judge her guilt to confusion ratio. if she demonstrates more guilt, ask her for the guy's contact info.
if she demonstrates more confusion, take her feet to the bedroom and immediately LSSF them things until you are drained dry and your upper lip stinks of her work day toe funk, and then take ur bike into the dealer the following day.
Posted by toeringguy (Member # 32356) on :
you had me going for a while there
Posted by RPM (Member # 2895) on :
i think i get the slight of hand.. but... i mainly don't get it.
nice twist to the story though.. like the turn to the valve cover.. real nice!!
what i do get, it's well written.. and being the BF.. makes it intersting.
RPM
Posted by sandyrog (Member # 30383) on :
what a waste of my time reading that, that is a minute of my life i can never get back
Posted by parce19 (Member # 2950) on :
lol lol
Posted by nusuth (Member # 7372) on :
what is really funny are the responses from ppl trying to give advice. Posted by shook (Member # 12484) on :
I hope the bikes ok man!
Posted by LeDaemon (Member # 198) on :
I read this joke before on rec.humor.funny
Posted by ned land (Member # 8065) on :
Reminds me of the old joke about one of the many differences between men and women: If you tell a group of people that you wrecked your bike, the women will invariably ask whether or not you were hurt badly, the guys always ask, how's the bike? ned
Posted by nusuth (Member # 7372) on :
quote: I read this joke before on rec.humor.funny
if that is a sly way of saying that its as old as usenet, i applaud your obscure but intelligent humor. Posted by babeflover (Member # 2953) on :
I was already thinking " poor guy, he lost his feet".LOL
Posted by Sinnister (Member # 2394) on :
That was sweet.
Good one.
Posted by Elvzz (Member # 14178) on :
I was lost, I admit - If I ever found out my wife were cheating no reason to call the family - I call the attorney and the locksmith.
Not sure the point of the message, but if she isn't cheating kudos!
Posted by Mikey P (Member # 1922) on :
i like how he starts out the thread with "hey brooke's BOYFRIEND here" and then says "my WIFE" lol
Posted by Toetapper (Member # 6473) on :
What piqued my curiosity was, given your swinging lifestyle, how could she be cheating? Was also wondering how one goes about hiding behind a motorcycle. Nevertheless, I read with sympathy and didn't feel a punchline coming until the oil leak.
I liked it.
Posted by cathymules (Member # 15805) on :
whatever
Posted by den2 (Member # 20517) on :
Personally I'd kill the fucker she's cheating on you with and make her watch, then I'd kill her skanky ass for fucking you over (but i'm just speculating "ha ha") DAMN WAR FLASHBACKS!!
Posted by ROYALS22262 (Member # 2681) on :
I'd prefer fewer jokes and much more pictures of the gorgeous and sexy BROOKE!!!
Posted by longhitter04 (Member # 2391) on :
My god...I can't believe this went over so many people's heads.
Posted by Toesucker85 (Member # 16795) on :
it was ok lol.
Posted by Andy-Laa (Member # 31511) on :
I love this one! hahahaha
Posted by domitilo (Member # 1325) on :
Does this mean that we will not be seeing anymore pics of Brookes sexy toes? That is what I care about> Posted by Sinnister (Member # 2394) on :
Are people this stupid?
Posted by bluetoelover (Member # 14736) on :
Some people's kids...
Posted by Mr.Papers (Member # 3205) on :
quote:Originally posted by bluetoelover: Some people's kids...
and now some of those kids have kids Posted by Five For Feet (Member # 33596) on :
LMMFAO!
I don't know what's funnier; the joke, or the responses of the people that don't realize it.
Posted by jono86 (Member # 9142) on :
quote:Originally posted by Sinnister: Are people this stupid?
people dont' read everything.. i read the first few lines and fill in the rest!
Posted by Toe Sucker II (Member # 1720) on :
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