I thought I'd start a thread for all the Al Bundy worshiping "No Ma'am!" card carrying members here.
My sis-in-law came over Sunday morning for my weekly big weekly breakfast. Things were looking good for a chance to do some feet pics as my wife and daughter decided to leave after breakfast to run an errand just leaving us two alone at the house for an hour. I'm really getting worked up for this opportunity too! Well we're sitting and talking a bit and she's talking about how money is running tight recently and so I use that as a segway into asking her about taking new pics and making a clip for her little store since we hadn't done it since May. She said she didn't feel like doing it and instead just ran her mouth a hundred miles a minute chattering in all different subjects with no relationship and I sat nodding my head in acknowledgment or adding an appropriate "uh-hmmm" whenever applicable. I was a captive audience until my wife returned an hour later. I tried to entertain myself with at least looking at her feet in thongs every once and a while, but that became a burden with the conversation.
The funny thing was when they returned my daughter looked at me funny and said, "Dad, why do you look so bored?" My sis-in-law was totally oblivious! I was so happy they came back that I took the opportunity to escape from the table to the bathroom where I took my highly religious Sunday morning dump with reading material in hand.
Will the next member of the "He Man Woman Haters Club" wish to take the podium?
Lady's of the forum, please take this as a chance to catch a glimpse of how men truly think on a primitive Neanderthal level. I'd love to read the lady's version of this thread which I'm sure will pop up in rebuttal!
[ September 11, 2007, 12:50 PM: Message edited by: LeDaemon ]
Posted by You (Member # 2107) on :
hahaha this was great to read Posted by FootLongSub Zero (Member # 19380) on :
"Huh? Sorry I missed that..." Hahahahaha
Reminds me of a Simpsons episode where the they were playin' softball and Mr Burns was explaining the hand-signal codes to Homer & Homer was miles away Sayn' to himself "MMMMMMMM I WISH I WAS AT HOME WITH A BAG OF POTATO CHIPS... MMMMMMMMMMMM POTATO CHIPS..." Posted by Mommie Dearest (Member # 18340) on :
You know when you title something MEN ONLY ... I just got to get a lookie look
To your surprise though, I am gonna say good for you for posting this thread. In fact - I feel for you in this situation ...
I have one question ... why not kick your feet up WHILE you run your yapper?? LMAO
Posted by A&F_FootDude_05 (Member # 2999) on :
quote:Originally posted by Mommie Dearest: You know when you title something MEN ONLY ... I just got to get a lookie look
Same way with Camille's little 'girl talk' post!
Posted by MarcusB (Member # 21192) on :
I hear ya man.....however your patience and listening may payout in the end, I have a model like that 'Kelly' she's toetally into it for a few months pedicures, foot rubs then picture taking then she hardly returns my phone calls...oh yea she is my ex-sister in law!
Posted by Wing-Washer (Member # 3013) on :
quote:Originally posted by FootLongSub Zero: Reminds me of a Simpsons episode where the they were playin' softball and Mr Burns was explaining the hand-signal codes to Homer & Homer was miles away Sayn' to himself "MMMMMMMM I WISH I WAS AT HOME WITH A BAG OF POTATO CHIPS... MMMMMMMMMMMM POTATO CHIPS..."
classic... Posted by Lou Gojira (Member # 983) on :
I'm kinda' in the same boat at the moment. There's this gorgeous girl I'm talking to a lot here lately, she seems pretty into me and everything...but God love her that girl can launch into a story about ANYTHING. Don't get me wrong, I don't mind listening for the most part, but jeez-louise...if I had a quarter for every time I went into "auto nod" I wouldn't have to work overtime for at least six months! If she ever quizes me on anything other than the highlights of what she tells me I'm royally screwed...
What I find funny about it is word around the campfire is she likes me because I listen to her.
I guess I should count my blessings though. I mean, how interesting would I be after a little while of running my mouth?
I can see it now: "You should see this movie, there's some yummy foot scenes in it...uh, uh...and I like playing video games because I like to play out violent fantasies...and uh...uh...I own five cats...and um...uh...I got a few gig's worth of pictures of barefoot girls saved on my harddrive."
Yeap, I think I'll stick to listening.
But since this is a thread to be a pigheaded asshole for a few minutes, here's a contribution...
Q: How do you know when a woman is going to say something intelligent?
A: When she starts by saying: "This guy once told me..."
Just joking ladies, those of you peeping in on this little "no girls allowed" treehouse. You already know you're Queens that make life on this planet a whole hell of a lot more interesting. Posted by You (Member # 2107) on :
Posted by LeDaemon (Member # 198) on :
Here's another thing! Men can get over shit quickly and women brood over it for eternity. Example! This past Sunday all my friends are playing a game I'm running (nerdy RPG stuff) and all of the sudden one guy is pissed off at my ruling and starts to blow a gasket and cuss me out! 5 minutes later we'll all laughing and having fun and its all forgotten.
I come home from work after working a 10 hour shift and I don't notice that my wife has taken a few moments time in between her all day Judge Judy watching marathon to dust a shelf she'll tear into me and then be pissed off and won't speak to me the rest of the night because "I don't think she does anything all day."
Posted by Alice's Feet (Member # 24441) on :
Oi! Enough of the male chauvinism! You guys need to get on your knees and start worshipping my feet to remind you that the women are in charge around here Posted by A&F_FootDude_05 (Member # 2999) on :
quote:Originally posted by Alice's Feet: Oi! Enough of the male chauvinism! You guys need to get on your knees and start worshipping my feet to remind you that the women are in charge around here
Yes Ma'am! Posted by LeDaemon (Member # 198) on :
quote:Originally posted by Alice's Feet: Oi! Enough of the male chauvinism! You guys need to get on your knees and start worshipping my feet to remind you that the women are in charge around here
Not until you've finished the wash and cooked us some dinner chickadee! And then only if there's nothing else on the TV tonight! Can you also rub my shoulders while I finish my coffee and the paper?
Love ya Alice! Posted by Mighty Mike (Member # 1922) on :
quote:Originally posted by Alice's Feet: Oi! Enough of the male chauvinism!
iron my shirt Posted by FootLongSub Zero (Member # 19380) on :
quote:Originally posted by LeDaemon: I come home from work after working a 10 hour shift and I don't notice that my wife has taken a few moments time in between her all day Judge Judy watching marathon to dust a shelf she'll tear into me and then be pissed off and won't speak to me the rest of the night because "I don't think she does anything all day."
OUCH! Dude I can't believe your sayin' this stuff out loud... there are women poppin' in and outta here Your sayin' what we're thinkin' .... BUT!!! I bet that night when it came to "FEET-TIME"... guess you were Hehehehehe Posted by LeDaemon (Member # 198) on :
The perfect woman! Posted by bluetoelover (Member # 14736) on :
Awesome pic LeDaemon...
Just finished watching Shoot 'Em Up and Paul Giamatti tells an awesome joke... "Why is a gun better than a woman?" "Because you can put a silencer on a gun!"
Since were on the topic of chauvinist jokes and thoughts..."How do you make 10 pounds of fat attractive?" Attach a nipple to it! Posted by Lou Gojira (Member # 983) on :
An oldie but a goodie. Posted by bluetoelover (Member # 14736) on :
Something is wrong with that picture ^ ^ ^
Old spice eh? Posted by LeDaemon (Member # 198) on :
Posted by FootLongSub Zero (Member # 19380) on :
Ummmmm sorry.... So you were saying......
[ October 18, 2007, 02:19 PM: Message edited by: FootLongSub Zero ]
Posted by Mommie Dearest (Member # 18340) on :
I know I know NOT A GUY
BUT ...
Posted by You (Member # 2107) on :
haha i had a mac exactly like that once
what about you mommie? that iron looks cool Posted by Mommie Dearest (Member # 18340) on :
nope - cant say I had one of those ... I'm more of a pull it out of the dryer, throw it on kinda gal haha
Posted by You (Member # 2107) on :
hehehe sounds good to me Posted by F18Hornet (Member # 11172) on :
Note to women: As much as I love ya, anything we said to you last week cannot be used in the argument we will probably have when I get home from work!
Bloke's phone conversation: (less than 20 seconds)
Man 1: Hello mate. Coming down the pub? Man 2: Good idea. [Pub Name], half an hour? Man 1: Done.
Plenty more to link off these Posted by Fate111 (Member # 2627) on :
I know that most of you have probably seen this before, but it goes with the thread so I'll put it here...
The Rules for Guys - Finally
At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down. Finally, the guys' side of the story. We always hear "the rules" from the female side.
Now here are the rules from the male side. These are our rules! Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
1. Men are NOT mind readers.
1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.
1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.
1. Crying is blackmail.
1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! JUST SAY IT!
1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.
1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really.
1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.
1. You have enough clothes.
1. You have too many shoes.
1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight.
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
Posted by Ninja of the Foot Clan (Member # 25128) on :
i loved the pic of the guy at the feminist march, 'iron my shirt bitch' lmfao
Posted by Ninja of the Foot Clan (Member # 25128) on :
quote:Originally posted by Alice's Feet: Oi! Enough of the male chauvinism! You guys need to get on your knees and start worshipping my feet to remind you that the women are in charge around here
![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif)
![[Laugh]](graemlins/laugh.gif)
I was so happy they came back that I took the opportunity to escape from the table to the bathroom where I took my highly religious Sunday morning dump with reading material in hand.![[Joint]](graemlins/joint.gif)
![[Evil Grin]](graemlins/evilgrin.gif)
![[Thumbs Up]](graemlins/thumbsup.gif)
![[Wink]](wink.gif)
![[Bow Down]](graemlins/bowdown2.gif)
![[Kiss]](graemlins/kiss.gif)
![[Smile]](smile.gif)
![[Hump]](graemlins/hump.gif)
.... BUT!!! I bet that night when it came to "FEET-TIME"... guess you were ![[Jerkoff]](graemlins/jerkoff.gif)
Hehehehehe ![[Tongue]](tongue.gif)
