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Hey guys, I have a weird question. Is it ok to masturbate when you're not with your woman? Its going pretty good with my new gf. We've been together a couple months and I have massaged her feet, recently started sucking her toes and licking her soles (which she likes) and even tried a little footjob, but it just made me sore and I could tell she really was'nt into it. We always end up having regular sex (which is good), but its only a couple times a week right now and I still masturbate on the days I'm not with her (usually surf feet sites or watch college girls walking by). I kind of feel guilty about it and wonder if I should try to stop since we're getting serious or is it normal?
Posts: 12 | Registered: Feb 2005
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ive been with my girl for almost 2 years now and i always jerk off on the offdays when she doesnt come over. Its just an everyday routine for me, and it probably always will be.
Posts: 1251 | Registered: May 2005
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I've been wondering about this myself. I don't have a girlfriend, but if I get one and I really like her, I imagine I'd be tempted to get rid of all the stuff (tapes, images) that turns me on. No real point to having it if you've got "the real thing," and I'd probably also feel a little unfaithful even though it wouldn't exactly be cheating. If you're in a relationship and there are days when you feel the urge to jerk off, your fantasies should probably only be about the woman you're with. That's what sounds proper to me anyway, but again, I don't speak from experience.
Posts: 350 | Registered: Nov 2004
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I'm lesbian , ok. But we girl's masturbate too! I often masturbate when ina realationship or out of one. As to getting rifd of tapes etc...I wouldn't throw such things out.... 1)you may end up spoending $$ to replace them 2) If you fake who/ waht you are ina realationship it's doomed to fail. Just be honest don't flaunt it, but don't make into something u have 2 hide.
-------------------- My dream is to order my own feet in a fancy restraunt! Posts: 132 | Registered: Jul 2005
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I can't speak for your gfs, and every women has their own feelings about this but if you were my guy not only would I tell you not to feel guilty about masterbating but I would encourage it. I think it only becomes a problem if you start prefering to do it more than having sex with your gf. Everyones sex drives vary and it is very common for men to have a stronger drive then women. You can't expect your gf to have sex every time you are in the mood so masterbating is the perfect alternative. If your gf is young she may think you don't desire her enough and that is why you masterbate. Find ways to let her know that she is incredibly desirable and that that isn't an issue. Myself I love to watch a man masterbate and enjoy masterbating while he watches. To me it is just another sexual activity that can be done alone or together. Alsp .. what makes you think she doesn't masterbate too?
-------------------- we can hit the floor and go and explore those popsicletoes Posts: 375 | Registered: Sep 2003
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quote:Originally posted by MrBob: I kind of feel guilty about it and wonder if I should try to stop since we're getting serious or is it normal?
There's absolutely nothing wrong with using masturbation as an additional outlet for sexual pleasure to complement the experiences that you share with your girlfriend. However, there are two potential problems which can arise from frequent masturbation that you need be aware of:
1) The first problem was efficiently illustrated by popsicletoes when she described a scenario in which you may actually come to prefer the release from masturbation more than from the sexual pleasure derived from intimacy with your girlfriend. I've known quite a few guys who have experienced this problem, and unfortunately they've rarely been able to find adequate means with which to turn their situations around, so you'd be best advised to avoid getting to that point in that first place.
2) The second problem which can occur regards the frequency of your masturbating sessions. A wise man once said that too much of a good thing can become a bad thing, and I think that logic applies here. By masturbating too often, your sperm count and sexual prowess can become significantly diminished, albeit temporarily so, but enough so to the point where your next sexual experience with your girlfriend can actually be affected and hampered by it. I'd recommend knowing when to masturbate and when not to masturbate in order to guarantee optimal performance when you're with your girlfriend.
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Sure we think it is fine. I'm a firefighter and work for 24 hours then off 48 hours. Just ask her to give you a pair of her sexy shoes or hose to smell and jerk off thinking of her feet. I do this often with Kim's shoes. I love smelling her sexy shoes and depositing my load on her shoes... Her feet not lok gorgeous they smell great too.....
-------------------- Firefighters are not extraordinary people.. Just ordianry people doing an extraordinary job !! Posts: 328 | Registered: Oct 2004
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posted
Some great advice so far out of everybody, and there's not a whole lot more I can add to it other than this:
If you're really loving this girl, masturbating when she's not around isn't an unnatural or detrimental thing...UNLESS you start letting your mind wander off to other girls...AND you do it too much (as CJ eloquently pointed out). By letting your mind wander off onto other girls, you run a good risk of building up impossibly high "standards" by which your girlfriend, no matter how hot she looks and how great she is between the sheets, could ever hope to reach.
Perfection, or the idea thereof, in my most sincere opinion, is never going to be an "absolute" set in stone...rather it is in a perpetual state of evolution, evolving and changing with you as you grow older. This evolution is triggered, of course, by outside stimulations.
Say for example you're a fan of female toes that have a "stair-case" look to them...big toe is the longest, the others fall in line getting smaller as you get to the pinky toe...and for example's sake, let's say that your girlfriend's feet have this look. Now, just imagine seeing a bunch of foot models who really get you worked up enough to paddle your pickle when your girl isn't around, and these models have a longer second toe. *BINGO* Outside stimulation...your "standard" has already started to shift...and now your girlfriend's feet may look "sub-par" to these girls with the feet you're wanking to.
That's why it's best...and the most safe...to think about your girlfriend when you masturbate rather than look to outside sources...that is if you love this girl, possibly want to spend the rest of your life with her, and you're already suffering a nagging guilt for self-gratifying in the first place. Us guys are damn near 100% visual when it comes to stimulation, so by keeping the visual in check, you can better control your urges, concentrating them where they need to go already.
Don't go nuts with it though...you're a guy and you're going to look at other girls. Looking and even acknowledging the beauty of other women is okay...perfectly normal male behavior. It's when you FOCUS and OBSESS on other women, such as masturbating to pics of other women, is when it could really become a problem for you.
Hope this helps.
-------------------- Like Girls? LikeReal Barefoot Girls?! Then this place is for you! www.dennis-n-mara.com Your best source for some Real Deal Hardcore Barefoot Girls! Posts: 5427 | Registered: Jul 2003
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posted
If the hair on your palms becomes too thick just shave 'em and forget about it.
I'm pretty sure about 99% of all men that are physically capable of it wank. The way I believe it works is if you are in a sexual relationship you probably wank more than someone that is not!
quote:Originally posted by popsicletoes: I can't speak for your gfs, and every women has their own feelings about this but if you were my guy not only would I tell you not to feel guilty about masterbating but I would encourage it. I think it only becomes a problem if you start prefering to do it more than having sex with your gf. Everyones sex drives vary and it is very common for men to have a stronger drive then women. You can't expect your gf to have sex every time you are in the mood so masterbating is the perfect alternative. If your gf is young she may think you don't desire her enough and that is why you masterbate. Find ways to let her know that she is incredibly desirable and that that isn't an issue. Myself I love to watch a man masterbate and enjoy masterbating while he watches. To me it is just another sexual activity that can be done alone or together. Alsp .. what makes you think she doesn't masterbate too?
Oh my gosh... I love this girl! Unfortunately my wife wants to be the only one who satisfies me and gets very hurt if she knows (she's caught me twice) that I masturbate. That I still do is the only secret I keep from her. I've spent my entire married life trying to get her to particpate with me so I could "do it" when she wasn't interested in full blown sex. The last year or two we've actually made some progress. Anyway, it is possible that your SO will lay some guilt on you.
Other than that, as long as you stay inside the boundaries mentioned by others you're both normal and fine. You just have a stronger sex drive than your GF.
I've actually come full circle in the aspect of being attracted to others versus my wife. Because she would not participate with me or allow me to masturbate my focus went outward to other women, via porn pics and vids and some public voyeuristic activities, particularly with women's feet. Consequently I was drawn very strongly to other women's feet and didn't love and appreciate my wife's. Since confessing my foot fetish to her and her incredible indulgence of me in it, my focus has now shifted almost exclusively to her feet (and footwear in my case). Though I look at other women's feet, I don't get as aroused or masturbate to them much any more, preferring my wfie's instead. And as I've mentioned before, she's more willing to share her feet for masturbation purposes than any other body part.
I don't know exactly why she takes this issue so personally, but I'm hoping that someday I can either masturbate only in her presence or with her blessing, with her understanding that it's her that I'm thinking about.
Posts: 9728 | Registered: Feb 2004
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posted
Just think masturbation as another extension of your sexuality. It seems that guilt has crept into your thinking and we can all thank organized religion, our puritanical history and Queen Victoria for the "Guilt" feelings creeping in our thoughts. Masturbation is a healthy extension of our sexuality and should be explored without guilt.
Posts: 13 | Registered: Feb 2006
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