posted
I thought I would start this post off with an attention grabbing header. To those of you who don't know my name is Alan. I'm 26 and I live in the most of the time great state of Utah. I would love to move someday but that's another topic. I have not posted on here in a while months to be exact. Earlier this evening I feel like I was not entirely proud of. I knew what I was getting into and I thought I would come on here and get some second opinions. I will try to keep this as short as possible and if there are any other follow up questions feel free to ask them below. Also I will be trying to put in paragraph breaks as best as I can so it's not all jumbled up. *deep breath*
I'm by most accounts I think a decently attractive tall,nice,funny,caring but shy and anxiety riddled guy. I have a loving family, great friends and by all accounts a promising future. I'm perhaps finally moving up in my job I'm back in school and I'm socializing and doing all kinds of things I didn't do even a year ago. Overall this has been a year of transition for me and I feel great about it. Yet there's still another side to me that most people except for one friend I have knows about and it's a side I'm trying to figure out how I feel about.
This may sound unusual for someone like me and when I've mentioned it to one or two people who were VERY close to me they were shocked. I have never had a girlfriend. I've been on dates I can talk to women just fine if we hit it off. However for too many reasons or excuses I have a hard time taking things to the next level. As such like the rest of you I have a foot fetish. I'm not ashamed of it in the slightest but you know at some point you'd like a release no harm in that right? My first foray into feet on a serious level was on my trip to New York City a few years ago. I went for other reasons and had a fun time but I found a web site that offered foot worship sessions so I bit. I enjoyed it and well kept it as that. Shortly after that I moved out of my parents house and into my first apartment on my own by myself in the "big city". The very same apartment I'm currently living in and writing from. Which presented itself with many oppurtunities good and bad.
It started off innocently enough for the first two years I was down here. I would occasionally go to a strip club and although I wanted to mention my fetish never did. Didn't care for lap dances or anything else so it was a very rare thing for me to do. I took a trip to San Francisco again on my own and although I hung out with a friend I ended up contacting another mistress there. She actually seemed genuinely interested in me (for what it was worth) thought I was cute and gave me her card with her actual number on it and told me to keep in touch. I was in no position to even think of moving out there seriously so I let that go. Finally fast forward to this last fall and here's where things get sketchy..
I was feeling lonely and decided to peruse backpage. For some reason I couldn't get myself to look at the escort section. I felt like there was somehow a difference between escorts and the "body rub" ad's that were on the site. I posted an extremely lengthy post that's on here somewhere detailing my first expeierence doing that foot stuff which went well. I was a repeat customer but eventually cut things off. I had my fun but realized I didn't like what I was supporting I felt bad for the girls who were in this place. You would think that would be enough but it didn't stop there. I lost alot of money to a girl I met off of craigslist where nothing happened but was promised foot fetish stuff. That's a whole story in and of itself. Then I came on here and read about guys going to strip clubs and indulging in their fetish and that's where things took off.
In the spring of this year when I had a bunch of money saved up I went on a bit of a bender. Almost weekly I was going to a strip club and getting a special private session. Meeting a new girl almost every time and most of them probably appreciated the attention I paid to their feet. I also was hooked up with a girl of another girl I met off of backpage who really enjoyed foot guys. This turned into a semi weekly expierence for me. Money was going down the drain and for what really? This trend has continued and suffice to say although for now I'm still not doing bad. I'm very frugal with my money otherwise and I do my best to make ends meet this is getting too much. You would think regular visits with these women would be enough right? Oh I had to go a step further and meet up with an escort. Not just one but now my second one in the last month at the same high end condo. They both loved my foot fetish and we got as far as oral and mutual masturbation but we didn't have penetrative sex. Now they weren't just any escort these were both supposdley college age girls looking to pay off bills. And trust me when I say that these women were absolutely STUNNING at least to me.
So I say all of this and you must think I must have problems meeting women. I don't I've become alot more confident in other area's and have gotten out and met some great women. I have potential in one or two (unless by chance they are reading this) and things are going well there. However I don't know if I can get over this other side of me that seeks out these random activities with women. I'm very careful and really even though I have some expierence there's alot I still haven't done. This is a very very small sampling of my life and story. So the questions I pose to anyone reading this. Should I be ashamed of any of the encounters I've had even earlier? Am I bad person? Or should I look at this as a shy guy who is just looking for some action and attention in all of the wrong areas? I feel like in some ways I've accepted this but what if I ever get a serious girlfriend and she asks me about my past? There's no way I could mention any of this because I just can't imagine a woman any woman being ok with any of this. Thank you for reading this :-).
Posts: 24 | Registered: Oct 2011
| IP: Logged |
posted
Dude, would you have done it different? I doubt it, everything you did was and will always be an experience that you pleasured and learned from. I dated a stripper for over a year, when we first met she wasn't one though. its been a learning experience but I for one will never EVER spend my hard earned money for anything sexual with another person. All im saying really is you did what you did and you had fun, you were young and there is no shame in that. I do think you should focus on relationships better and open up to a woman you might end up marrying someday. But ill tell you this, your still going to be broke either way haha.
Posts: 18 | Registered: Dec 2010
| IP: Logged |
posted
I don't think any of your experiences make you a bad person or that you're doing anything that's very wrong. I think there are more than a few guys on here that have had foot fetish experiences with strippers at gentleman's clubs, massage parlors, backpage, etc.. For me, personally, I've had experiences with the first two in my 20s and 30s. I was also very much like you at the age of 26 - i.e. reserved and worried about what girls I like will think about my foot fetish if I decided to "take it to the next level". I'm sure that my concern over that helped to ruin/prevent a few experiences that I could have had with girls.
It wasn't really until my late twenties and into my thirties that I began to realize a few things. The first thing is that if a girl is really attracted to you, having a foot fetish and showing her your love of her feet is not a deal breaker. Her being into you is half the battle.
The second thing I learned is that your odds of getting foot action - and this is even with girls you're just friends with - get better if they're comfortable being around you and feel at ease in your presence. Yeah, this takes the investment of time and some patience. However, it has the potential to lead to having a few girls who are willing to be "friends with foot fetish benefits". This might be an ideal situation for you, since it sounds like you're at a place where you're more interested in having foot fetish experiences with a number of girls, rather than looking for one girl to have a serious, steady relationship with.
The third thing I learned, and this one was the most challenging (at least for me), is to be comfortable and confident with yourself, including your foot fetish. This ties into the last point of a girl being comfortable with you. The way to get a girl to feel comfortable being around you is to be comfortable being yourself. This translates into you thinking that your foot fetish is no big deal to you and that it's just a normal thing for you. If you don't treat it as a big deal, girls won't think it's a big deal when you escalate from a foot massage to sucking their toes, etc.. For me, at least, going to strip clubs and having those kind of experiences helped me to get more confidence and treat my foot fetish as no big deal. Yeah, these strippers were getting paid to take me for a private dance in which I then massaged their feet, sucked their toes, etc.. However, more strippers than not were open to having that experience, which was positive reinforcement for me and helped me to realize that many women in general, can, and will, accept a foot fetish if it's presented to them the right way - that is, you being okay with yourself and comfortable having a foot fetish.
And, of course, if you do end up in a serious relationship, don't ever bring up your experiences at strip clubs, massage parlors, or escorts on backpage, etc. with these other women! If a woman you want to get serious with asks you about your past, just tell her that you were never as open or outgoing as you are now and that you were shy being around women, which really sounds like it's accurate in your case. This also demonstrates that you've grown as a person, which is something that women like in guys.
I would just use your experiences that you've had so far as learning tools. Let them be guides to learning to have confidence in yourself and to be aware that there are plenty of great, attractive women out there who have the potential to be okay with your having a foot fetish and who would be willing to accept it and indulge you in it.
-------------------- "I like feet... A lot!" Posts: 2167 | Registered: Sep 2004
| IP: Logged |
UBBFriend: Email this page to someone!
Printer-friendly view of this topic
![[Wink]](wink.gif)
haha.
