The questions are pretty simple, yet they might take a while to come up with answers that are fair.
Does this woman have a legitimate gripe, or was she blowing things out of proportion? On a scale of 1-10, how much would you say she treated this particular event (or problem) way too seriously?
What does any of this have to do with feet? You'll see.
So assuming that most people in society don't see feet as a sexual thing, if I passed a girl in a Starbucks and complimented her on her having nice eyes, would that be viewed as sexual harassment as well?
Because truthfully, in my opinion that's all this guy did.... he paid her a compliment. She had her feet on display, and he complimented her on them. He didn't say he wanted to smell them, or lick them, or cum on them... THAT would have been sexual harassment. All he said was "nice feet" and that is considered harassment? Come on man.
-footboy1
Posted by John doh (Member # 49762) on :
Holy shit. That woman is kinda nuts. Every is so god damn sensitive now days. I wish I could wind back the clock like 20 years when people didn't seem so fucked up.
Posted by standerman2000 (Member # 15936) on :
I would never give a complete stranger a "compliment" like that unless she was wearing toe rings,anklets,loud pedicure and was obviously showing her feet off.I think both of these douche bags should lighten up and get a better life.
Posted by 5thgear (Member # 46148) on :
This proves the point that's been stated over and over again about jumping to conclusions when first meeting or in an approach. She even mentioned that she understands people have foot fetishes and it's not a bad thing.
Posted by hyperion (Member # 39397) on :
Sorry dudes, the person who gets to define "harassment" is the person to whom comments are directed. Unwelcome advances are unwelcome.
I'm checking out of this discussion so as to not participate in an internet argument. See y'all...
Posted by feetiesandtoes (Member # 32674) on :
Her feet are disgusting. And she's an uptight, liberal feminist who is probably terribly ugly and is mad at the world cuz the only guys that hit on her are older, middle-aged black men in a wheelchair.
Posted by catsman (Member # 10269) on :
My ex-sister-in-law worked at a busy office for years, and said she and most of her friends agreed that the difference between harassment and flirtation depended on how good looking the guy was. If this feminist/activist was complimented by a handsome young man with a nice voice, we'd never hear about it.
Posted by aka.footjoyboy (Member # 32751) on :
I think it was a fairly perv. thing to say to a woman that you don't know, and her reaction was a bit over the top; but if he got the message then maybe the old "dapper" perv. won't repeat the behavior.
Posted by footboy1 (Member # 4549) on :
quote:Originally posted by feetiesandtoes: Her feet are disgusting. And she's an uptight, liberal feminist who is probably terribly ugly and is mad at the world cuz the only guys that hit on her are older, middle-aged black men in a wheelchair.
-footboy1
Posted by FailureSexual (Member # 15094) on :
quote:Originally posted by hyperion: Sorry dudes, the person who gets to define "harassment" is the person to whom comments are directed. Unwelcome advances are unwelcome.
I'm checking out of this discussion so as to not participate in an internet argument. See y'all...
sorry, but i tend to agree with some posters that the difference between flirting and harassment is how good looking the guy is. i'm sure brad pitt could walk up to any women in the world, say "hey, i would love to cum on your tits" and 9 times out of 10 a woman would be cool with it. so, please, judging by this story it sounds like someone upset an unattractive guy gave them a compliment they'd be cool with if someone better looking had said the exact same thing
Posted by FailureSexual (Member # 15094) on :
quote:Originally posted by feetiesandtoes: Her feet are disgusting. And she's an uptight, liberal feminist who is probably terribly ugly and is mad at the world cuz the only guys that hit on her are older, middle-aged black men in a wheelchair.
nice job throwing in the racism on the end of that insult, i highly doubt black dudes would bother with her but thanks for letting Wu's know you hate "niggers"
Posted by catsman (Member # 10269) on :
quote:Originally posted by FailureSexual:
quote:Originally posted by feetiesandtoes: Her feet are disgusting. And she's an uptight, liberal feminist who is probably terribly ugly and is mad at the world cuz the only guys that hit on her are older, middle-aged black men in a wheelchair.
nice job throwing in the racism on the end of that insult, i highly doubt black dudes would bother with her but thanks for letting Wu's know you hate "niggers"
What the bloody hell.....?
Posted by BareSoles84 (Member # 45910) on :
Generally, attractive women wouldn't care about an innocuous comment like this. In fact, I believe many would probably welcome it, as they're likely used to men fawning over their overall looks, breasts, ass, etc. They generally like male attention in general, but are very selective in who they give their attention to being that they have options. It's very rare you'll see a good looking female complain and go on a harangue about being objectified, hit on, sexualized, etc.
From what I've gathered, it's feminists that complain about the aforementioned things, but I've noticed that many of the things they complain about are things they don't have to worry about because to be candid, they're generally not that attractive. In my personal opinion, it's deep seeded resentment that causes them to do that because they don't receive the male attention that an otherwise good looking female would get, so they need to get their "attention" by acting like they're speaking for and defending all women.
I think interaction between both males and females these days has gone south. I think many females these days are very vain and in order to inflate their own self worth, act like they are "entitled" to nothing less than a charming stud, even if the girl is average looking at best. They construe any simple comment from a male as if he's "hitting" on her, even if that's the furthest thing from what the guy is doing and he's just simply asking her for directions, for instance. Although at the same time, I believe a lot of males these days have developed a sense of entitlement when it comes to women, as if the woman owes them a chance. Nobody owes you anything.
I think society puts a lot more pressure on males though, being that males are traditionally the ones that need to court the females; being the one to approach her and strike up a conversation, ask the girl to prom, ask her out, ask her to marry you, etc. Consequently, this causes the male to be the one in this position that is putting himself out there and facing possible rejection, while the woman essentially sits back and decides who's "worthy" of her admiration. Often times you'll only hear the term "socially inept" get applied to males because they're the ones having to put themselves out there and if he looks he slightest bit nervous or says the wrong thing, he gets labeled as "socially inept". However, in my opinion, a lot of females are just as socially inept, if not more, than males because society doesn't put pressure on them to have to be socially adjusted when it comes to male-female interaction.
It's a very sad society that I think our culture has created, because it's created a lot of selfish, entitled and overly sensitive individuals.
Posted by Fair Adam (Member # 13350) on :
What a colossal mind fuck; I'll never get the time I spent reading that article back, and that sucks because I enjoy learning things, but not being preached to. OK, this is me, the bleeding heart Liberal, who hates racism and sexism, or any other form of discrimination or repression, but I find this woman way the hell too sensitive. That old man should have kept the comment to himself, but I think that if you're going to yell "sexual harassment" based on a single tame comment, you're probably stretching your point a bit too far.
Don't get me wrong, I know that most women, specially young ones, get bombarded constantly with comments about their looks, raging from the tame to the lewd.
Should men make leering comments on female anatomy? Absolutely not.
Should men objectify women? Absolutely not.
Were women placed on Earth to be judged by men solely based on looks? Absolutely not.
I personally don't like to talk to strangers unless I have a good reason 'cause I don't like strangers talking to me without a good reason. This makes me wonder if this woman would have replied so forcefully if the guy making the comment was young and attractive. I mean, if coming from a "cute" or "hot" young guy, it would be just as objectifying, but would she have tolerated it or reacted the way she did? I guess we'll never know, but I've seen this kind of selective judging once or twice in my life. Just saying.
Posted by catsman (Member # 10269) on :
I heard George Carlin many many years ago quip, "it's ironic that most of the feminists clamoring for abortion rights, you wouldn't want to fuck anyways". Doesn't quite fit into this discussion, but reading through the thread made me think of it.
Posted by 5thgear (Member # 46148) on :
I checked out her FB page. Maybe she's one of the less blessed in the face but has perfect feet.
Posted by BareSoles84 (Member # 45910) on :
I personally think it was extremely dumb of the guy to say, "Well, you shouldn't have had your feet out there like that." A lot of males I noticed justify their actions by claiming it's the female's fault for causing him to act the way he did, as if the guy himself has no control over his actions.
However, the part in particular where I stopped taking the woman seriously is when she was sobbing to the Starbucks employee when the employee asked her what is wrong, and the woman started out by saying, "It's stupid, but..."
That tells me that she subconsciously knows that she's blowing the whole thing way out of proportion. If she genuinely took this whole situation seriously and it really did affect her that much, she wouldn't start off by saying, "It's stupid..." Similar to when us foot guys go to tell someone about your fondness for feet, and you say, "I know this sounds weird, but..." You're dead in the water because you're essentially conditioning the mind of the person you're speaking to into thinking that what you're about to say is weird. In this woman's case, stupid. When the employee essentially agreed with her that it was kind of stupid, she then further flew into a fit of rage because she felt the employee was failing to see her plight.
In my opinion based on this article, I don't glean that this woman gets much male attention. Generally, good looking females who get a lot of male attention wouldn't fly into a fit of rage over an innocuous comment over their feet. And if she certainly was that creeped out about it, most females wouldn't make it a point to go out of their way and confront the guy again and tell him how creeped out she is; she would simply just leave and/or if the guy left on his own, not follow him to confront him.
I personally think this woman sounds like a bit of a narcissist to me, and it's likely because she doesn't get much male attention to begin with so as her own defense mechanism in her mind, she's developed this tough outer shell where she builds herself up in her own mind and flatters herself. She probably does want male attention, but I bet the guy that complimented her feet wasn't the type of guy that she wanted male attention from in order to make her feel satisfied, so she just used it as a way to put the guy down and inflate her own ego.
To me, it was actually pretty funny; their argument in particular. I probably would have been laughing to myself as an onlooker because it sounds like to me it was essentially two socially maladjusted people interacting with one another. First, you have the guy who is probably not very smooth in his approach with women, trying to pick up on a woman who probably doesn't get picked up on very much to begin with. Just sounds like it'd be a funny sight to see, in my opinion.
[ June 23, 2016, 02:25 AM: Message edited by: BareSoles84 ]
Posted by National (Member # 8568) on :
quote:Originally posted by catsman: I heard George Carlin many many years ago quip, "it's ironic that most of the feminists clamoring for abortion rights, you wouldn't want to fuck anyways". Doesn't quite fit into this discussion, but reading through the thread made me think of it.
Speaking of comedians, Bill Maher once said something that ties in with what people are saying in here: "50 Shades of Grey is only romantic because the guy is a billionaire. If he was living in a trailer, it'd be an episode of CSI:SVU."
----
I agree with everything BareSoles84 said. I might come back in here in a few days with my take on the word "objectification."
Posted by seattlesoleman (Member # 8598) on :
Overreact much?? Ansolutely blown out of proportion to further an activist agenda. Like she was just waiting for something like this to happen.
Posted by edelbrock (Member # 17055) on :
I understand harassment and have personally seen women get harrassed by pushy men and it's deplorable. But this? A man who just pays a compliment and walks off? Who says he even has a foot fetish? The man was obviously just trying to show her some positive attention.
I can't believe that these feminists and SJWs honestly believe it's an insult to compliment their body as the default setting. We are literally bred via attraction and people go out of their way to look presentable. A general non sexual compliment to most should be an accepting accord. This is not some patriarchal influence in our modern society, this is literally how we function as a species who wants to procreate.
And as far as harassment, it's the man who was harrassed. I understand what hyp is saying, but honestly you simply can't call every approach harassment. It's literally a detriment to our social functions. The man was cornered, lectured, and cussed at; how in the world is that appropriate behavior compared to dropping off a passing compliment?
Reading this girl get worked up over it all and I can't help but think that women like her have problems deeper than thier view of modern society. If men were 100% not allowed to approach women at all, ever, how would we ever attract mates?
Posted by BareSoles84 (Member # 45910) on :
quote:Originally posted by edelbrock: I understand harassment and have personally seen women get harrassed by pushy men and it's deplorable. But this? A man who just pays a compliment and walks off? Who says he even has a foot fetish? The man was obviously just trying to show her some positive attention.
I can't believe that these feminists and SJWs honestly believe it's an insult to compliment their body as the default setting. We are literally bred via attraction and people go out of their way to look presentable. A general non sexual compliment to most should be an accepting accord. This is not some patriarchal influence in our modern society, this is literally how we function as a species who wants to procreate.
And as far as harassment, it's the man who was harrassed. I understand what hyp is saying, but honestly you simply can't call every approach harassment. It's literally a detriment to our social functions. The man was cornered, lectured, and cussed at; how in the world is that appropriate behavior compared to dropping off a passing compliment?
Reading this girl get worked up over it all and I can't help but think that women like her have problems deeper than thier view of modern society. If men were 100% not allowed to approach women at all, ever, how would we ever attract mates?
I concur with all of what you said.
You mentioned that women like the one in the article, may have problems deeper than simply their view of modern society. I would agree, and I honestly think with a lot of these feminist types, their behavior actually stems from a deep seeded resentment and jealousy towards attractive females who routinely receive the male attention that they don't, and often from desireable males.
As I mentioned in my second post above, consequently, I believe these types of women develop a narcissistic, sense of entitlement in their minds to the point where if they can't have whatever other (attractive) women can have, then nobody (all women) can have it. And it's all under the guise that they're doing the female gender as an aggregate whole a favor, but as I've mentioned before, it's extremely rare that you will see an attractive female who routinely gets male attention complain about the things that a lot of feminists do, nor will they react the way this woman did to an otherwise, innocuous remark and compliment about her feet, which I'm sure to attractive females who probably get a lot of comments on their breasts or rear ends, would probably be a breath of fresh air.
As I mentioned, I think deep down, this woman probably DOES want male attention, but from the same caliber of males that attractive women can otherwise attract. This guy I'm presuming probably wasn't the type of guy that she felt "entitled" to, so she just used the situation as a way to inflate her own ego and flatter herself in the sense that she's in a position to reject and disparage someone, and claim that she finds it to be "harrassment" and "insulting" whenever guys approach her because they must be only after her body.
Posted by edelbrock (Member # 17055) on :
quote:which I'm sure to attractive females who probably get a lot of comments on their breasts or rear ends, would probably be a breath of fresh air.
I'd be careful with assumptions like this. I do believe the SJW narrative is a little overzealous when I hear stories like that if this lady, but men certainly do have a habit of overstepping boundaries when they expect attention from women. A lot of women literally fear men's approach because of how aggressive, demanding, or crass they can be.
But in this case; a drive by compliment that doesn't have any direct sexual undertone? This lady is blowing things out of proportion.
Oh and I'm not 100% certain I believe her exchange went down quite how did. "Shouldn't have had your feet out there" sounds more like an embellishment for a good story than an actual response. Then again, he might have been so dumbfounded by the approach that these thoughtless words very well could have fallen out of his mouth..
Posted by Kyf (Member # 88) on :
A couple things to add. First, based on what I read this woman has a few deep seated issues as is apparent in her statement " I have had to demonstrate strength for much of my life, even when I didn’t quite have it, because I had to deal with a lot of bullshit." Trouble looking for a place to happen it seems.
I also agree with those who have stated that it isn't ok to make comments like that to someone you don't know. Is it ok to extend a compliment like "nice ass/butt" to a total stranger. No it isn't and to guys with a foot fetish it is pretty much the same thing. You can't say its only feet when you are sexually attracted to feet. Occasionally I see posts on this board labeled women who love showing off their feet (recent posting within the past week). I really doubt that many of these women are trying to arouse foot fetish guys. I think that women are becoming more aware of how common it is for men to be attract ted to their feet, especially when they are pretty. I think it helps our cause when we can show them a pleasurable experience in our intimate relations while restraining ourselves from impulsive public displays toward the objects of our desire. An ass man can't go around telling the girls they have nice asses and get caught sniffing up their office chairs and get away with it can he?
Posted by Rocky @TheSoleMates (Member # 28971) on :
I have no problem complimenting a stranger in public. His comment was wrong and he shouldn't have talked to her the way he did. However, she should not have freaked out the way she did. At first, she had no clue if he has a fetish for feet, or was innocently complimenting her.
I have so much to add to this, but I'll leave it be here to avoid arguments.
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