quote:

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Originally posted by Rider Aldebaran:
And if you really loved the woman, you wouldn't mind seeing her every day for the rest of your life.

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You know, it's not a sin to want to get away from your spouse once in a while. It can even be healthy for the relationship.

Maybe it's just me.

If I ever find a girl that wants to see me every day for the rest of her life, I'll need to re-evaluate, of course.
 

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Posted by Saffron (Member # 42786) on :
 
Marriage is overrated. People change when vows are said. To blame? The male ego unfortunately! And expectations are inadvertently created by both men and women. Stay single or just live together, is my advice =)
 

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Posted by nusuth (Member # 7372) on :
 
funny how a woman says its the male ego.
 

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Posted by Libertine (Member # 35475) on :
 
I wouldn't want to get married or have kids until I'd built myself and experienced as much alone as I would feel happy with.

If I were going to do it, I'd do it properly so the common complaints would hopefully not be there. The woman I married would have to be pretty similar so no bitterness about settling or not having done enough wouldn't come up.

I'd be very suprised if I ever got to the point where I could dedicate my life to others (wife and kids) because there is too much I want to do for myself.

That said, I'm only 20 so if I get cracking now I might be able to get myself ready before all the good women are gone and the chance to have kids with someone vaguely my age disappears!
 

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Posted by bluetoelover (Member # 14736) on :
 
I just got married this past April and we have lived together for about 4 years before the marriage so really nothing has changed. I couldn't imagine marrying someone without living with them(and apparently that happens all the time?!). But I see what the OP is saying, there is times where the wife will go with friends on a shopping trip out of province for the weekend and its just great to be able to have some "Me" time. Which I am sure she thinks too.

I personally know some couples who seem to be attached at the hip, which is fine of course, but I just can't see how that IS healthy( or a trusting relationship for that matter) if for example the guy or girl can't go and grab a drink or two with some friends without having the other there....
 

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Posted by LeDaemon (Member # 198) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by bluetoelover:
I just got married this past April and we have lived together for about 4 years before the marriage so really nothing has changed. I couldn't imagine marrying someone without living with them(and apparently that happens all the time?!). But I see what the OP is saying, there is times where the wife will go with friends on a shopping trip out of province for the weekend and its just great to be able to have some "Me" time. Which I am sure she thinks too.

I personally know some couples who seem to be attached at the hip, which is fine of course, but I just can't see how that IS healthy( or a trusting relationship for that matter) if for example the guy or girl can't go and grab a drink or two with some friends without having the other there....

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Me and the missus lived together for five years before we were manacled together. Now we've been married for 16 more years. We've never had problems going and doing our own things without the other. As a matter of fact I'm taking a 4 day trip with my dad to New Orleans while she stays at home with our daughter.
 

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Posted by bluetoelover (Member # 14736) on :
 
Exactly LD! Hell, prime example is happening this weekend when the wife is heading out of province to a stagette party and I'm just gonna be chilling at home and enjoying the "freedom". Will I miss her? Damn right I will but me and the xbox and some beer have a date
 

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Posted by Cloyster (Member # 33045) on :
 
I just got left a few months before the wedding with no warning or explanation. I dunno, my whole opinion of marriage and kids changed when her little baby from another relationship called me Daddy for the first time. Enjoy ur youth and stuff but i would never close the door on the possibility.
 

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Posted by Keyfeet (Member # 27313) on :
 
First of all, cut it out with all that ,,,,,, ,, ,, ,,, stuff, its annoying.

Honestly, I gree with everything you say, except seeing the same person everyday. As long as I like the person. I would really like that, bc I hate meeting new people, and having to change. Once I am settled, thats the way I want it to stay.

But the main reason why I don't want to get married, is bc I've seen it go sour way too many times. Bitter divorce runs in my family (especially on my mom's side), and yeah when it does go bad, they are misarable. And the kids are misarable too. And it really tears your family apart.

The reason why I don't want kids, is bc I'm not really into hanging out with kids who arent potty trained. And teenagers, forget it. I wish I could have a kid who is permanatley in the ages of 4-10. Thats when the seem most fun, and easiest to deal with.

Plus its like rolling a huge die with a million sides. Most of them are good, but you really dont know what you will get. You would most likley get a healthy beautiful child, but then again, you may not. Im sure you know of more than enough births that didn't go perfectly.

And I wouldn't want my sex having sex and ending up pregnant at a young age. Bc I know that they say its all in how you raise them, but thats NOT TURE! And its something that I am not willing to risk.

And also I would want my kids to get along with each other. I haven't talked to my brother in 7 years. And have a horrible relationship that can't be mended. (However this wouldn't apply to me, bc apparently, in my family, this trait seems to skip and happen to ever other generation. My grandmother didnt talk to her sister, and great-great grandfather didnt talk to his brother. but its not the case with my parents or great grandparents)

But being single is not something I particually want forever either. Mainly bc I dont want to be, as Chris Rock calls it, the old guy in the club. And even though I don't think I will get married, I would really enjoy being married. And I know that if I got married, I wouldnt get a divorce, but she could divorce me, and take everything. And I would hate to put my kids through that. But I doubt I would have any kids.
 

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