quote:Why does this happen?.... Basically, life gets in the way...
You hit the nail on the head.
quote:I mentioned the amount of sex you have dimishes, but the quality of the sex that you do have goes through roof. Everyone is different in their sexual tastes, and when two people REALLY get know what the other likes (and this comes from years of practice), the sex can be mind-blowing.
Very true. To me "old married sex" can be just as exciting as ever. I just know that when my wife kisses me passionately and does the things she does with me and for me- it's still a blast after 28 years. And as mentioned there are LOTS of other emotional benefits to knowing and really understanding who you're living with.
Posts: 9728 | Registered: Feb 2004
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- Right on man! That's the post of a guy right there with experience. So true in the fact that although when you get married, the amount of times you have sex might go down, the quality of it just goes up and up. But I would also argue this even for couples who are in long term monogamous relationships. For me, I like my sex intense/passionate/savage/animalistic/close/bonded...and if I could get that EVERY TIME, I would definitely take that over sex that's just "ehhhh"...
It's funny man, relationships are really complex and there's a lot of subtle dynamics that are constantly working against one another and with one another BUT there are a few things that should be constants and one of those I feel is C O M P R O M I S E.
To the guy that started this thread...Your girl HAS TO COMPROMISE WITH YOU MAN, especially after three years dude. And somebody who is able to compromise with their partner, shows not only maturity and self-confidence but at the same time TRUST. They TRUST that although they will perform (insert sexual act here), they will get whatever they want in return. This is maturity in a relationship between two ADULTS, not two kids in high school who don't even know what turns them on. If she can't see this man, then CLEARLY she is not mature, does not have the self confidence needed to be in a serious relationship with another ADULT!
So I'm inclined to think it's not you man. You know you like footjobs right? WELL OWN THAT. Now, if she's not mature enough to even muster up the self-confidence to get you off, to know that you like footjobs and you like feet and she's not willing to compromise with you then why you with this broad? And if she won't compromise on something as silly as footjob, what's stopping her in doing that with other parts of your relationship?
Dude if I was you, I would ask her flat out "WHY EVERY TIME WHEN I ASK YOU TO GET ME OFF WITH YOUR FEET DO YOU ALWAYS HUFF AND PUFF?? See what she says...if she comes back to you and says "oh well, I feel like I kinda HAVE TO do it every time you ask me" then she is manipulating you man...Manipulation through obligation. If she feels like she HAS to do it and doesn't WANT to do it, then she is trying to manipulate you into never having to ask her to do one again.
posted
"If she won't do what you want, dump her and dump her quick... life is too short"
This is the answer I read most often when someone posts that they are not getting enough of what they want, or aren't getting anything. The problem is: This is a black-and-white answer to a grey question. It makes way too many assumptions. It is a rookie answer. What xyzhousexyz needs to do is to determine the root cause. Why is she not indulging his needs or being enthusiastic about it?... Is it that she is sexually inhibited? Could it be that she doesn't find her feet attractive and is therefore uncomfortable? Has she had a bad experience in the past?
I too have spent time with girls that weren't enthuastic about indulging in foot activities. What I've found is that in 99% of these cases, there was a reason that could easily be worked through.
XYZ, if you really like this girl, then you'll need to find the answers to these questions and determine the reason behind the reason. I'm sure you'll find that in most cases there are solutions that can easily fix the situation. The key here is communication. No one here will be able to give a definitive answer because all anyone here knows about you is what you post. No one else here is privy to all the information that contributes to this relationship.
Again, my suggestion is to COMMUNICATE! Don't throw away a good relationship without determining if you can salvage it. If you get into this practice, you'll have a long and hard road in front of you.
On a side note... If you live by the practice of quickly dumping girls that don't give you what you want, you'll develop a bad reputation. If you get that reputation, you'll have a hard time getting ANYTHING from ANY girl.
Posts: 638 | Registered: Aug 2004
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