posted
so my girlfriend, while pretty naieve about life, thinks she can control everything. She was friends with some dude, which was cool with me, I have a lot of girl friends and she has several boy friends. Anyway, I had a bad feeling about this one dude. He seemed immature and pretty much a horny bastard.
She was freaking out about school and all kinds of shit a while ago, and we got in a fight. No one was around but this dude and she went to hang out with him later that day.
He forced himself on her and pushed her head down in his lap. She says she was telling him no and trying to pull away etc, and before she knew it the bastard came in her face. She ran away.
She pretty much didn't think about it for 2 months and then just yesterday had a nervous breakdown about it. She called me and told me, told her parents etc.
So I don't even know what to think or what to do.
My instinct is to snuff out the dude, but realistically, I've got too much of a life ahead of me to waste it doing some 20 year old piece of shit. I knew the first time i met this guy that he was capable of this, and i've been going out with my girlfriend for a long time now, and never for a second mistrusted her, and I am not one to trust pretty much anyone. It's not like this is my first girlfriend, and I've had them that cheated on me before, but this doesn't feel the same.
usually my policy is if someone cheats, that's it. but i don't even know what this is. Ironically her dad is a doctor and an expert on sexual abuse. He's set her up with a shrink that is really good with this kind of thing.
So what do I do? I want to support her, I want to believe her, and I may even be able to do that, but should I? Most of the time sexual abuse happens in a similar fashion to this, where the girl is taken so off guard that she doesn't know how to react. I mean, I've dealt with this kind of thing before, but it was never my girlfriend.
I emailed the guy and just told him "I know what you did to my girlfriend", no threats or anything like that. I had to let him know I knew, and my reputation is such that he's going to sweat. He doen't know I'm smart enough to not screw up my life legally on the account of a piece of crap like himself.
So this community here has got a lot of experience in a lot of things, please advise.
Posts: 639 | Registered: Mar 2006
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posted
Let it go and move on with your relationship if you like your girl. If something like this happens again dump her instantly. For now take her word for it and just move on.
Posts: 45 | Registered: Mar 2006
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posted
You're correct in thinking you shouldn't waste yout time and life on seeking revenge on this scumbag. Concern yourself with things that will help the situation. Let the law handle justice. If you intervene with anger or violence, you'll only make things worse.
posted
You're a bigger (and more intelligent) man than I am. If someone did that to my girlfriend they'd be saying.."remember that idiot that messed with sinnister's girl?"
posted
good move not to waste your life on a punk like that...
i'm very inclined to believe your gal wasn't looking for this and that this is really strssing her out and that is why she eventually broke down. granted.. she may have been on a slippery emotional slope at the time.. but he was fully in the wrong and this has little or nothing to do with her at all.
be supportive.. be attentive.. and just listen to her. she'll find a way to let you konw what to do by you listening.
it would drive me nuts.. i won't waste my life on such a low life either.. but i would be pissed!!!
just be there for her... and when she's worked through this.. you'll be her knight in shining armour! my momey is that she wasn't looking for this guy to be with him or anything.. just she felt 'safe' around him and he took advantage of her.. he preyed on her.
ride it out and talk it out and listen more than anything.. cudos to her dad for the support he's giving her. that is all i've got
posted
Perhaps i'm a paranoid and mistrusting person. But how could he have time to cum on her face if she was trying with all of her might to pull away the entire time? He would have to have used both hands to keep her there, and I doubt anyone could cum without contact in a matter of less than a minute.
Like I said, I may just be paranoid, but it seems(to me) that she appears to be immature, fought with you and then cheated and regrets it so now is playing the 'forced' card. I would talk with the guy and see his reaction to her side of the story.
Posts: 425 | Registered: Jun 2004
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posted
I've been on the other side of the scenario scarlet mentioned, and my advice is to proceed with healthy skepticism... I too find it difficult to imagine how he could simultaneously get his penis out, stroke it, and force her unwilling face in it with only two hands I feel for you bro, that's a hell of a situation. You sound like you're too smart for this drama to me. Take care of yourself first.
Posts: 484 | Registered: Dec 2004
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I feel for you bro, that's a hell of a situation. You sound like you're too smart for this drama to me. Take care of yourself first.
