posted
i know we all talk about being comfortable with our fetish and not hiding it from anyone, but i have a situation where i am not sure of the right thing to do. it hasnt happened yet, but it very well could and soon.
my wife and 11YO daughter were watching some bachelor/ette stuff online and somehow a clip from the foot loving twit from the last bachelorette came on and i guess he made reference to her feet on it. my daughter gets very confused and said what does he mean? my wife said some guys have a foot fetish and that they really love feet and they find them sexy. she said oooooh. does dad have a foot fetish? my wife laughed and said to her, i'm not sure. you should ask dad.
this was earlier in the week and she hasnt mentioned it yet, but i am not sure what to say if she asks. its no big deal, but is a sex life kind of thing.. and it's not like i would tell her that mom and i like to play a little BDSM.. but then again, we are very open and my wife has told her that yes, she is bisexual and knows that from experience. any thoughts?
posted
Kids are VERY observant - she has probably noticed you checking out your wife's feet. Which would probably be why she asked "does dad have a foot fetish?" So, if she suspects it and you and your wife have always been open with her, maybe ease her into it by telling her that you find everything about your wife including her feet to be sexy. Then see how it progresses with any further questions she may have.
Great question!
MoMan
PS - I still think your wife's toes are awesome!
-------------------- I only moved to St Louis because it has a high arch! LOL Posts: 476 | Registered: Dec 2002
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posted
I was in sort of the same boat, nusuth. After my 11-year-old noticed that I spend a lot of time enjoying my wife's feet -- massaging them, kissing them discreetly -- the answer I gave her was, "I love your Mom from head to toe." That seemed to work. I'm sure she'll figure out the rest of the story some day, but I don't believe now is the right time for my child to have to ponder the answer beyond that.
Sounds like there's a greater degree of sexual openness in your home, though, so it's hard to say what would work for you. I have to admit that I'm not sure why a foot fetish would be a bigger issue than having already told your daughter that your wife is bisexual.
Cheers, DL
P.S. -- I also agree about your wife's pretty feet.
Posts: 841 | Registered: Jul 2002
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posted
I actually have a tattoo on my back with feet prints and says fetish under it. A little hard to hide at the beach...
Posts: 8 | Registered: Jun 2008
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posted
i got a chance to discuss this with my wife and she actually advised that i laugh it off and not be so open. i was definitely surprised and when i asked her why i shouldnt just admit to it, she said we dont want to freak her out too much. as much as she was shocked when i was answering her questions about me liking women, i think she'd not be able to handle the fact that you like my feet. it's just too weird for someone just entering her understand of sex.
posted
me personally if i had an 11y/o daughter suspecting me of a foot fetish, i would not be talking to her about my intimate affairs. suggest you keep your answers very brief, vague, & respectable when children are involved.
posted
yeah that's not the kind of thing to discuss with an 11yo...only a few years left of that sweet innocence before she becomes a teen
Posts: 88 | Registered: Dec 2006
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posted
I'd say to recover and if ever asked again, say, "No way. Mommy's feet stink!" She'll laugh, you'll laugh and it'll be over.
I sure wouldn't feel right about it. I know I am REALLY comfy with my foot fetish, but sometimes I get a wrench thrown into the mix where I'm caught off guard.
One time I was going over Mindee's house to do some photos. Mindee's folks know what I do and happened to be over, but in a different part of the house. Well, Mindee's younger brother had his girlfriend over and she was like 14 at the time. During the first set Mindee called her into the room and was like, "Can she get in a fun picture with me, not for the site?" I was like, "I'm sorry, I don't feel right doing that and I don't need someone's parents out to kill me." With Mindee so comfortable with it and I guess her sharing it with her brother's girlfriend, I was just a little taken back. I think I did the right thing though and Mindee actually told me later she felt bad for putting me on the spot like that.
Long story short, just pass it off and there is no need to share details.
posted
As MOMAN said... "kids are very observant"... Yes they are.. I have a nine year old daughter. I just tackled explaining what being "gay" means... My opinion NUSUTH... The "birds & bees" talk is one thing... but "foot fetishism" and all the other niches is something she's gonna have to just figure out on her own... What matters most to kids is that their Mommies & Daddies love each other.. So if she sees you massaging or tickling your wifes feet to her it's no different than giving her a hug...
Posts: 749 | Registered: Oct 2004
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posted
Hell, I have a 12 year daughter and when she was young as 4 or 5 she went with me to take a few pictures of some women feet I knew and sometimes she help with the lighting. Now, I have at least 40 8x10 picture in 11x14 frames all over our home. I like women feet my daugher knew and under I like women feet and that's all she need to know at this point. oh, her brother is 10 and he understand too. This is what I figure out. Their is nothing to be shame of as long as it don't hurt other because all of my models are of age.
posted
Interesting. Good topic! I'm decades away from that, but I too will have to cross that bridge at some point. Thank you.
-------------------- If she won't indulge your fetish, I bet you that cuter, smarter girl across the bar will. Lets go find out. Posts: 1877 | Registered: Aug 2006
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posted
don't think I would share it. I like the whole laugh it off and mommy's feet stink thing. It's funny though that your wife was confortable enough to answer her about being bi sexual and she thinks you liking feet would be tough. How would an 11yr old be curious if their mother like girls anyway?
-------------------- New Ship but she's got the right name. You treat her like a lady and she'll always bring you home. Posts: 4051 | Registered: Apr 2005
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posted
How was your wife's bisexuality announced to a 11yr old? Assuming she told her when she was 11 and not 10 or 9 or 6. Seriously, that's none of her concern, she's too young to know this kinda shit. Unless you want her to start getting curious and lose her virginity at the tender age of 13, you need to stop.
Posts: 139 | Registered: Nov 2006
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quote:Seriously, that's none of her concern, she's too young to know this kinda shit. Unless you want her to start getting curious and lose her virginity at the tender age of 13, you need to stop.
yeah.. anyway.. we are very open in all ways with our kids and with the things they are exposed to thru friends and tv, how could we ignore sexual preferences? i can name dozens of references in pop culture where homosexuality and bisexuality are brought up and instead of ignoring that the fact that millions of people are not heterosexual, we've discussed it. we dont go out of our way to talk about it, but we certainly will answer any questions that are asked. when lady gaga came out and discussed that pokerface is about her thinking about being with women as she is with a guy that lead to a discussion. when a contestant is on reality show and he or she talks about his/her homosexuality and questions are asked, we answer them honestly and openly. when eventually my daughter asked my wife if she liked women, my wife was honest and admitted that she did. my daughter asked her how long she's known and what she had done. my wife explained to her about how long she knew but told her that what she's done is not something that needs to be discussed. i think it healthy and smart to have an attitude where your kids arent afraid to ask to about things like this. my daughter had actually asked me about being gay quite some time ago and was uncertain that she might be. i asked why she felt that way and she said she sees women on tv and think they are beautiful. i asked her if she looks at the boys in her school and thinks about holding hands or kissing them and she said well yeah in an embarassed way. i then asked has she ever thought about that way with a girl. she said no. i said ok. that means you arent gay, you can appreciate that some women are beautiful.
now how would having an relationship with my daughter and letting her be completely comfortable asking us about anything being bad? *shakes his head*
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my wife laughed and said to her, i'm not sure. you should ask dad.
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