quote:Originally posted by BareSoles84: often times in order to overcome these insecurities, we have to first admit that we are indeed insecure to begin with, which a lot of people find difficult to do.
This resonates so true as I see some fetishists exhibiting these patterns quite often in their failed pursuits of hot women's feet and they are never able to admit it.
quote:Originally posted by Rocky TSM: Still waiting to hear how things went. Have you done your cold approach yet? We're all rooting for you.
Yes let's hear the intricate details.
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Join thousands of our fans on Twitter @Norcalfeetdotco Posts: 18306 | Registered: Apr 2003
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solefull00
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I approached a woman today, she looked to be of Asian origin and told her she had beautiful feet. She did not understand what I said and I tried to talk to her more but she said "no thank you" and continued walking. My main objective (at least immediately) is to get used to approaching women. I know some successes will follow. I just have to work through it. Thank you for the great advice.
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quote:Originally posted by solefull00: I can pick up girls no problem, it's just trying to pick them up specifically for photoshoots
How do you normally 'pickup' without approaching?
Sounds like you tried to skip the basics and rushed straight for her feet. It's usually best to open and start a conversation first.
I wouldn't recommend walking straight at someone, or trying to stop them, rather, make your approach while walking the same direction, pass, then look back over your shoulder and open. (basic principles of a good opener discussed on page 1)
Your body language should convey that you're going somewhere and just pausing for a minute to say something.
The idea is not to try to attach yourself, but to be interesting enough that they don't want you to leave, then things naturally turn into a conversation.
It's probably going to take a fair amount of practice to get good, and involve being rejected regularly. No one is ever 100%, but in time your odds will increase as you develop a good intuition.
quote:Originally posted by goodguyneighbor: Your body language should convey that you're going somewhere and just pausing for a minute to say something.
The idea is not to try to attach yourself, but to be interesting enough that they don't want you to leave, then things naturally turn into a conversation.
These are absolutely golden nuggets of wisdom that every man should learn! I think it'd be awesome if you could do some sort of youtube v-blog mini series with little lessons that can be conveyed to those men out there who are trying to improve their social skills with women. It'd definitely be helpful in the foot world, that's fer sure!!
The best results always come from those who understand women the most!!
In also the analogy with panhandlers and solicitors, might I also add the manner in which they approach you also triggers an innate human response.
They're typically static and they attempt and cut you off head on to stop you, or by trying to talk to you while they're static and you're moving. If you're already in motion, it's unlikely that you want to stop and talk to them; especially if you already know they just want something from you as mentioned. Objects in motion tend to stay in motion.
Cutting someone's path off head on and stopping them triggers a natural human response and immediately makes someone feel as if they're on the defensive, being that you're right in their face and making that person feel as if you're preventing them from continuing on the trajectory they were before you cut them off.
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Another common thing is guys thinking they should wait till the girl is alone to approach, but it's actually easier to approach groups.
It's also almost always best to approach right away as soon as they become aware of your presence. The longer you wait, the more chance you'll overthink the situation, and the more it seems like stalking.
The idea is to be social and spontaneous without needing anything from them or placing any value on the outcome.
Posts: 1090 | Registered: Oct 2004
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How is this related to the topic? It was an okay read if you want to laugh at the immaturity of a supposedly open-minded woman.
On topic, I've done quite a few cold approaches. In my opinion, the hardest part of the whole thing is how to catch the womans attention off the start without seeming creepy or too weird. If you can break the ice, it's smooth sailing from there usually as long as you keep them interested.
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This reminds me of humans and fire. It's like a group of people standing around the man behind the curtain explaining how to rub two sticks together to make smoke and a spark, when we have butane torches, lighters, flame throwers etc.. available now lol. Think about that in terms of the topic, there's no art or technique that works everytime since every female is different and so is every situation.
At the end of the day, all it takes is "Business Casual Confidence" (which any of the Current Webmasters here possess) and a Smile to get their attention to make the first impression and from there they will be eating out of your hand like a little birdy.
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Yeah it really isn't rocket science, but there's a definite art to it, and still a huge percentage of guys who struggle with something as simple as talking to strangers, women in particular.
Indeed the first split second of an interaction is a critical defining moment. You only get one chance to make a first impression as they say. Once you've blown it, it can be difficult to recover.
By the same token, when things go right, it's like magic how quickly things can progress. I'm often amazed when a hot girl I met 30 seconds ago is now following me to go sit down and show me her feet.
posted
You only get one chance to make a first impression indeed. After blowing it, it can be difficult to recover from. First impressions tend to get ingrained in people's minds.
Perception is everything when it comes to making impressions and I think the most important, easiest thing that a lot of people, guys in particular, forget and don't realize is that the one who controls how you want other people to see you, is yourself. You can't expect a stranger to see you in a particular way that you want them to see you as when you're not conveying that or giving them that perception at all in any way.
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quote:Originally posted by goodguyneighbor: it's like magic how quickly things can progress. I'm often amazed when a hot girl I met 30 seconds ago is now following me to go sit down and show me her feet.
so freakin true and it's amazing every single time. Many guys out there can only dream of being so lucky. Truth is, it's more knowledge and technique than luck. That's the part that confuses these laymen
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